I was a tomboy. I wore the same combat trousers every moment I wasn't in school uniform for about three years - mum thought I'd be buried in them (still time!). I spent lots of time climbing and falling out of trees. I was always on my bike, never hanging around on foot around town (great legs as a consequence!). I have grown out of it a little, but the traits still pop into my days occasionally - I have a killer bruise just today from falling off my bike, in fact! I'm no stranger to mud, sweat and don't mind poking gross things in the garden. Once a tomboy, always a tomboy!

True story: Playing a game of baseball with a mixed group a year or two ago, I was first up to bat for my team. I was offered a tennis racket and turned it down, much to the delight of the doubting Thomas's (yes, male players). I smacked that home run - highest scoring player of the game. Get in. 

This is the story of my (not especially athletic but) tomboy life so far. 

As much as I appreciate girls come in all shapes and sizes, attitudes and styles, I wouldn't discourage my future potential daughters from being a tomboy. I've learned so much about myself being a tomboy - something you can empathise with?

This one goes out to all former child/teen tomboys around the world.

19 Things I Learned From Being A Tomboy

It's not always a great move to chop off all your hair. Or even part of it - when I was at Uni I used to cut my own hair over a sink (partly to save money, but also because it was short and curly so no one noticed any errors!). This was something I regret come Graduation Day photos! Also, be prepare to be judged as a lesbian. Ridiculous as it is, it happens. 

Tomboys are not necessarily competitive sports freaks. They come in many forms, so just be who you are. You're unique, and you can still be a reader tomboy! I can't throw a frisbee for love nor money, but hey, no one's great at everything. Apart from possibly Neil Patrick Harris. 

Remember, gyms are not just for weight lifting obsessed muscle freaks, retired folks loosening off and gym bunnies who aren't really sweating. Likewise, it's not just men who body pump or boot camp - you'd think this is obvious, but it's not to many. It's absolutely fine to be what you deem as 'normal' and just go for a little workout at your own speed, without a layer of mascara. And what more perfect place to parade your favourite baggy tee?

So what if your favourite film is Cool Runnings? We don't all have to like Legally Blonde. 

Not being afraid of a bit of mud has led me to many opportunities I would never have had otherwise: my Raleigh International expedition is a great example. I learned so much about myself on this eight week project, changed the direction of my life, made many friends, including my now husband! 

All I wanna do is play outside! Movies are great for nights in, but it's healthier and more fun to be out in the fresh air. Winter or summer, you'll find me out and about tramping around. 

I know my physical limits - from drinking competitions to knowing how fast I can ride my bike round a corner with no hands, I know my body and what it can take. 

Trouser suits look just as smart as a skirt/dress suit. I never wanted to wear a dress my mum tried to put me in as a kid. My tip - don't force the kid to wear a dress if she doesn't want to. Harmony in the household is worth more than a swishy outfit. And heels make your lush legs look longer. 

Confidence can come from being both tomboy and girly, but nowhere is confidence in a woman more required and cultivated in a male orientated industry, like the waste sector. I work in waste and recycling, and I've had to deal with some 'old school' girl-scoffers who didn't like the fact I was educated, young enough to be their daughter, and a woman. Being able to tough it out and prove my ability to get my hands dirty has helped me here. I'm not saying you can't be a confident girly girl, but showing I was not scared to get in a graft and not sit pretty at a desk all day did me favours. 

'Sexy' Halloween outfits are not me. I dressed as Bob the Builder for my 18th birthday party and rocked those overalls! (Wish I had a photo to share - I'll have a root about...)

It's fine to hate pink, but you know, there is a tone which would look good on you (mine's a dark fushia kinda shade). Try it, it won't hurt. My favourite work outfit is now bright pink tights, black shirt, black shorts and black heels.  

Avoiding makeup isn't a bad thing. Too many 11 year olds are caked in foundation and eyeliner. Natural beauty exists. When I was a teenager I avoided mirrors, and I couldn't be arsed with it all, honestly. Added to my phobia of eyes, it took me ages to done a bit of slap. Even now, I mainly only use eyeliner and a bit of blush on a special occasion and I'm happy like that. You'll find what suits, if you want to wear it, but make sure it's you and not your mates who decide you should wear it. 

"Cool" and "dude" are not just words for boys to use. A female mate at work and I exchange these words as a greeting now - it's turned into a joke, but you get the idea. 

When you DO doll-up (if you do) and wear a dress and heels, you'll be amazed at the positive reaction. I always felt like a fraud wearing a dress and like make up just wasn't me. As I've grown up a bit, I do wear more dresses (knitwear, mainly), but I definitely feel more comfy in a pair of jeans. Don't feel people are encouraging you to change - just graciously accept the compliments and pull the jeans back on when you get home. 

On the subject of baggy tees, everyone, no matter who you ask, will have a 'scruffs' outfit for lounging around at home. It's just some people's are joggers and a Kaiser Chiefs shirt, and others are a Prada onesie. Yes, they make them too. 

"No makeup days" don't have to be an 'exposing' social  media campaign or a day when you're couch bound. Lots of women look fabulous without makeup. Check out Dame Helen Mirren going on a dinner date with her husband recently without 'a face' (from Daily Mail).  It's just some people's are joggers and a Kaiser Chiefs shirt, and others are a Prada onesie. Yes, they make them too. 

Hand-me-downs are brilliant - especially when they're Hardy Boys books or Lego sets. 
It's totally ok if most of your friends are guys. Some girls will hate you for it, but that's life. You won't be liked by everyone, whoever you are. Girl mates are essential though - make sure you have a couple you can count on for sharing good and bad times.

Your favourite shoes are simple flipflops or walking boots - that's not a crime. They're often cheaper than heels and last a helluva lot longer!


It's ok not to adore the latest heartthrob. I was a teen in 'the Titanic years' and never understood the obsession with the young Leo DiCaprio. Now he's older, and a bit rougher, yet, but not floppy haired Jack the lucky poker player. 

Moral of of my story

Sure, get girly: I know I love to have coloured toenails, but it's also ok to be a tomboy, be keen to get your wellies on, prefer action flicks and worship your bike. I've learned a lot about myself doing it and would never stop a child of mine becoming one. 

Do what you want (as long as you're not hurting anyone). It's all about choice and who you want to be - a form of feminism. Strong women can be girly or tomboyish, but it's important to be who you want to be. "Don't take no crap off of nobody!" - thanks Cool Runnings!

There's no wrong way to be a girl. 

Check out #likeagirl on Twitter for inspirational fights against the fact you're a girl holds you back. Feminine slights and anti tom boy attitudes are coming to an end.

Lou x

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Born to be a Tourist - my travel blog, currently featuring lots of tomboy biking!

As tweeted on April 24th...



Chilled sun 
Shirts off 
April breeze 
Summer's coming 


#sixwords #micropoetry #poem

It truly feels like British summertime has arrived here in Bristol - enjoy!

What poems has the nicer weather inspired for you?





Lou x

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“Breaking the silence”. I heard this phrase yesterday, and, although I’ve heard it many times before, the words sounded differently. Breaking the silence – I listened to the words and wondered ‘what does that actually mean, and why do we use that exact phrase?’ Thus, the inspiration for my blog today!

As you know, ‘breaking the silence’ means someone has spoken or created a noise to sound through a patch of silence. Normally it’s said in context of a conversation pausing for a few moments, minutes, and then someone speaks.

To me, breaking the silence is a simple phrase, but the more I thought about it, the more violent it sounded.  

Breaking… snapping… cracking…smashing…

Bored, I Googled the origins of this phrase.  I learned this phrase is widely used as organisation and campaign names. It’s one of my favourite phrases, and I have seen it printed on many occasions, but little did I know the full impact and use of these three words. Here are a few of the results I found. Some strong messages…

BREAKING THE SILENCE

A Guatemalan organisation which promotes social, political and economic justice. Find them on Twitter here.

A UNICEF campaign against child abuse.

A programme created by the International Federation of Medical Students’ Association for enhancing the relationship between doctors and their deaf/hard of hearing patients.

A controversial political group.

A website which encourages learning about the trans-Atlantic slave trade.

A website with lesson plans for teachers trying to help kids understand mental illness. These guys are also on Facebook, if you want to know more.

A film called ‘Lima: Breaking The Silence', a drama based on the true story of Peruvian rebels who in kidnapped hundreds of high-ranking diplomats and government officials in an attempt to force the release of 400 political prisoners.

A sexual abuse support group for male Asians living in Yorkshire (supported by Comic Relief). 

There are also several books with this title (mainly about suppressed personalities, hidden sexual preferences, sexual abuse or 'taboo' illnesses).

It’s a prolific phrase – one I hadn’t considered the full impact and emotion of before. This simple phrase has been hijacked by evil causes, and been made more important by its use by causes good. Terrorist group aside, 'breaking the silence' has give words and a voice to those who have previously kept their stories of struggle and abuse hidden.

What a powerful phrase.

Lou x

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This week I was to share the video above. This was a real gem of a You Tube video I discovered through Paula Reed Nancarrow. Isn't it fablulous?!

If you want to find more gems related to writing, take a look at Paula's blog. She'll make you very welcome.

Happy weekend all - and I hope you get your typewriter/laptop dancing through a word count!

Lou x

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How good do you feel when you drop your milk bottle into your recycling bin?

Do you think 'ahhh, doing some good to the world!' as you stuff your newspapers into the recycling bank?

FANTASTIC! KEEP GOING!

However, I want to challenge you today about your recycling habits. More and more people are recycling in the UK, and that's excellent, but it is time for moving forward and doing more.

"Recycling can be a cop-out for consumers, making us feel justified about buying stuff in excessive packaging." That's what Katherine, writer for Treehugger says. I know what she means - so what if you're doing the norm and recycling your household waste like a good resident? That's not the 21st century point of waste management!

Have you heard of waste minimisation?

It's what comes when you've been recycling happily for a while and have got the hang of it. The idea of this is, yes, recycling your waste wherever possible is great, but not producing the waste in the first place is even better. 

Some ideas to get you going...

1. Let's start with an easy one... Choose to use reusable bags when you go shopping. This will reduce the amount of plastic bags created, used, and thrown away. There are some dead trendy reusable bags out there, but your old backpack will work just as well. 

2. Try to buy products with less packaging. The coconut, for example, solves shipping problems by having it's own perfectly suitable packaging in the husk, so avoid shrink wrapped coconuts or ones sold in boxes. And if you can't reduce the packaging, try to choose materials whoch are more readily recycled - check with your local Council for info on your area, but most places seem to accept glass, card and paper, and plastic bottles.

Do be aware of packaging myths though - most packaging is there to keep the food fresh and protects it in transport.

3. What to do with old jam jars...? Know someone who's into pickling or making jam? They will welcome your donations. 

4. Donate your unwanted but completely fine clothes/furniture/household goods to charity shops. There's a huge market for second hand items, both from the more and less affluent members of society. Not throwing these items in the bin saves them from landfill and puts them to good use. You'll also be helping out a charity - a double 'feel-good' whammy!

5. Cut down on unwanted mail by putting a small sign on your front door politely asking for no more junk mail or free newspapers. This also applies to Junk Mail. Visit MPS ONLINE to register for mail preference services (UK only). You can also register previous addressees and people who have passed away so this mail no longer comes through your letterbox.  

6. Use rechargeable batteries to save on disposal of old batteries - but even better, use the mains wherever possible. If you're worried about the old 'leccy bill increasing, copy my cheapskate-ness and charge your phone at work!

There are still some people who don't recycle, but most of us are making the effort. And if you go one step further with waste minimisation ideas, you can start to be aware of how much waste and recycling you're generating and work on reducing it to a more healthy, sustainable level. 

Feel that joy in recycling - just try to expand on that and make your world a greener more joyful, self-satisfied place!

If you want to know more, a good place to have a read is “Zero Waste Home” by Bea Johnson and “Garbology” by Edward Humes. They come well recommended. 

Lou x

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Writing retreats don't work for everyone, as writer Max Dunbar points out, and they're certainly not cheap. However, the idea is still quite appealing to me. Enforced writing time seems to work for me - as I plan to do this weekend! Timer will be set, wifi turned off, I WILL be writing like mad!

I've never been on an official writing retreat... I wonder if I'd be more productive if I wasn't at home... 

What springs to mind when I think of these so-called 'writing retreats'?

Peace. Productivity. Creativity. 

That sounds perfect to me. Send me some of these good vibes this weekend, please!

Leaving town, escaping the house/family/work/most recent dilemma to concentrate on your writing. Sounds appealing. Writing itself aside, did you ever think of the kind of accommodation you might be able to find for such a retreat?

A recent acquaintance of mine, John Errington, inspired this post, really. He collects old shepherd's huts and turns them into mini (stationary) caravans, some of which are purchased with the intention of letting them out to writers who want some peaceful isolation. They're kind of like camping (no toilets on board), but with a solid roof above your head, and often small kitchen facilities built in. 
                  
           The original shepherd's hut:                        The magical accommodation John creates:

How cute is that?! I bet you feel closer to nature in these old huts, in the fresh air without the threat of being washed away (says the hardy camper!), and there's no wifi - what an escape!

John started refurbishing these huts around 10 years ago, when he discovered an old one on a neighbour's farm. Aside from the shepherding history this hut had, it had also been used to house Prisoners of War in World War II. Some of the older huts have been found to have poems written by shepherd hand - some more with more raunchy content than others!

"The first hut I acquired was destined for the bonfire," John says. A lucky find then, for him, and a great way to recycle something and preserving a bit of history at the same time. 

The task of refurbishing this hut was bigger than John originally thought: "Everyone thought I was mad, wanting to undertake such a task- even I nearly gave up when I realised how much work was involved," he says, laughing now. "I think it is a primeval instinct we have and knowing these huts had a really valuable purpose in a former life makes them more desirable."

As the first hut slowly came together over five years, it was used for dinner parties for John and his wife, and the occasional sneaky Sunday afternoon nap as it became a more suitable lodging space. Many of the orders John takes now are tailored; he's built garden rooms, huts used on glamping sites, and painting studios. Beds are optional, but what is a retreat if you can't stay overnight? Another bonus of these huts is that they blend in with the natural landscape and don't need planning permission. Huts can also be customised with painted surfaces and external cladding can be installed using the original builds (normally timber or corrugated steel). 

The most impressive improvement to these refurbished huts is that they are insulated, top, bottom and sides. You guys know what it's like sitting still typing all afternoon - it can get chilly! And when you feel like your circulation could do with a boost, you only need step outside the room into the fresh country air and take a stroll to clear your head and perhaps, gain more inspiration. 

"Refurbishing shepherds huts is very important in making sure they are preserved as living proof of part of farming’s history," John tells me. "I am very proud to be able to restore a 100 year old part of history, hopefully for another 100 years."

Peace, productivity and creativity. Those three words sound entirely appropriate for John and his shepherd's huts. Peace - what he creates for people to enjoy. Productivity - a project to be proud of on completion. Creativity - what an amazing use of a piece of history otherwise destined for the bonfire. May many more writers and non-writers find these three words in John's huts for years to come!

If you'd like to know more about John's shepherd huts, please contact him direct on 07530 395152 or email john4.errington@outlook.com. UK orders only. 

If you're looking for a writing retreat to try out, take a look at the following websites. I can't promise they'll have one of John's huts on site, but there are lots of opportunities in the UK and abroad for a peaceful, productive writing escape. 

Writers Online Directory                    The Writer's Compass

Writers Retreat (international)            Urban Writers Retreats (e.g. in London)

That's it for this week! I won't be posting for the next couple of weeks as I'm off to Costa Rica. I may have intermittent internet, but in the main, I'm getting married, so I'll be a bit distracted! See you back on the first week of September. Adios!

Lou x

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SMASH - Swindon Mentoring And Self Help. It's a fantastic charity based in Swindon, UK. 

Why do you need to know about this organisation? Well, since 1999 SMASH has been 'bringing young people together with willing and committed volunteers who can support, advise and listen to them in a sustained long term mentoring relationship.' The charity gives young people at risk the chance to develop and reach their potential, giving them confidence to grow into responsible and happy adults - sometimes when no one else believes that this is possible. 

How do SMASH do this amazing job? With their amazing volunteer mentors, that's how! This month saw a new intake of mentors who spent a day mixing with their potential mentees and other new mentors. The lively group took on challenges like raft building, archery contests and assault courses, all with the aim of matching up the young people with an appropriate mentor. Kind of like mentor speed dating, they had a fantastic time meeting each other, and word has it, mentors and mentees alike are excited to find out with in the near future who they've been paired with. 

Exciting activities aside, SMASH encourage the volunteer mentors to befriend the young person they're paired with. The idea is to be someone they can trust, someone they can possibly use as a role model, someone they can confide in - if they wish. Mentors are trained to recognise signs of abuse, and they are briefed on child safety (among other important issues). They are told not be step in to cover an absent or disinterested parent, but simply to 'hang out' with their charge and give them something they can depend on. If the mentee chooses to open up about problems they may be having, the mentor is there to offer an ear - but no advice. The mentors are only linked to their young person for 12 months, but the benefits to both mentor and mentee are significant. 

Taken from a recent news article on SMASH:

Luke Withington, 17, was matched with one of the charity’s mentors two and half years ago. Since then he has become a SMASH trustee and a spokesman for the organisation. He is one of the many youngsters preparing for the [10 mile run] challenge in September.

“The charity helped me come out of my comfort zone and I got the help I needed to get my own problems sorted,” he said. “I was diagnosed with depression after they helped me out and it turns out I had had it for four years without knowing it. They taught me not to give up on myself. The service they provide is astounding and I am a living, breathing success story.”

Do you think you have it in you to help a young person discover their confidence?

Can you offer the companionship just one boy or girl needs to develop?

SMASH are looking for Swindon area volunteers who wish to become a mentor for these young people (normally from 13-16 years old), so if you think you could offer friendship and adult role model competencies, get in touch!

Contact SMASH:

Tel: 01793 729748

www.smashyouthproject.co.uk

Find SMASH on Facebook or check out their Twitter page.

Have a fulfilling weekend guys, see you next Friday! 

Lou x

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Images courtesy of SMASH

I’ve been feeling so inspired lately – lucky me!

But why?

I think it was due to a couple of big boosts I’ve had to my writing ego.

First of all, Travel Generation approached me last week, asking for me to write them a few articles for their travel blog. I was more than excited, having enjoyed some previous posts on this website, so accepted immediately. Three articles of mine are due during next month and September, so keep an eye on my Facebook for news of their publishing dates. Totally encouraged, I went on a creative binge, and not just in writing for Travel Generation. Blogs and articles were free-flowing!

Secondly, last week was Towcester Writers meeting for July. The pre-set theme was ‘Pre-Wedding Jitters’ (I wonder why…?) and I read out a short piece of 1200 words I’d worked quite hard on. I wasn’t totally sure it worked, but writing on that theme seemed to come a bit easy. The theme wasn’t true to life at all, and I did get asked how my relationship was with my mother (it's fine!), but the group loved my short story. I have never had such an enthusiastic reception from my fellow writers! Chuffed!

So how has this helped me?

Well, since that successful reception, I have entered my pre-wedding jitters story into a competition. It’s been so long since I’d entered a writing competition and it felt good to be back in the saddle. I can’t share the piece with you until the winners have been announced , but I’ll be sure to post the story on here in September when the deadline has passed.

Why am I blogging about this? I'm not bragging, honest: I think it’s good to formally and deliberately recognise these moments of inspiration. So many times in a writer’s life we struggle with ‘writers’ block’ (real or imagined) and sometimes it can feel like we’re writing the same old stuff on the same subject. But when those precious occasions come along when you feel truly excited and inspired to write, we should grab them with both hands and see where it takes us.

How have you felt inspired lately?

Lou x

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I'm not happy with the title of this piece, but I hope the story itself works out well. This was read at a recent Towcester Writers' meeting. We were given a prompt of THE DIARY. 

--------

WAKING UP

Tuesday 3rd June 2014

No alarm clock had been set for this morning, and it wasn’t an accident. There was a medley of clothing strewn over the floor. There were empty bottles in the bin. Some unrecognisable keys lay just inside the doorway. Someone needed to open a window. 

It was the morning after the night before. At least, Kate assumed it was still ‘morning’. The sun streaming in through the half-drawn curtains certainly suggested daylight hours were firmly in progress – and it was promising to be a hot day. She didn’t want to open her eyes; Kate recalled the disorientation of going to bed last night and could only imagine the mess which waited to greet her. “Morning!” … a sprightly greeting she imagined, coming from imaginary lips of the muddle. “Now, clean me up, you bad girl!”

Kate’s legs felt like they were glued to the bed sheet as she attempted to roll over, the light Egyptian cotton sheets almost too much of a physical burden. Blindly fumbling on the unfamiliar nightstand for some paracetamol, placed there yesterday in anticipation of the headache pounding in her temples, she nudged the man sleeping to her right.

It was his turn to wake up.

He looked so peaceful, dammit. As relaxed as a monk on dope. How did he do it? There was no sign of the same aches, exhaustion or plain suffering Kate was experiencing. She’d seen it before, and no doubt, she’d see it again. Many people had a higher tolerance to those kinds of shenanigans than Kate did. It was just so bloody infuriating. Well, irritating at the very least. She couldn’t summon the energy right now to feel an emotion more extreme than ‘irritated’.

Forcing her eyes to open more than a paper cut’s width, she wasn’t sure if it was condensation running down the window panes, or if her eyes were having that much of a problem focussing. It was so damn hot. She tried to remember whose idea this had been.

‘Never again…’ Kate thought.

Wednesday 4th June 2014

This morning, Kate was her own alarm clock. Body clock reset from the events of the last 48 hours, she was ready to go. The more familiar room was tidy and aerated this time, the window blowing in a slight breeze. This morning the sunshine beckoned instead of threatened.

“Up! Up! Let’s go!” Kate cheerfully said, poking the same man in the ribs. “Come on, we haven’t recovered from yesterday to waste today in bed!”

Shortly, you would find man and wife a drink’s spill away from their ocean view balcony. Cocktail in hand, toes in sand. The holiday Down Under was just beginning. 

Lou x

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Image courtesy of WikiHow

I'm having a bad day. A toughie. Things don't always go the way you want them to, but it's detrimental in more ways that one. Sometimes chaos intrudes in my brain and it makes me not want to write. I'd rather be tucked up with my duvet watching the next episode of Dexter, the DVD box set I'm working through just now. 

However, I am a writer. I am a blogger who posts on Fridays, so I would be letting myself down if I didn't post something here. 

So what can I share when I'm feeling 'meh'?

Here is a list of things which make me feel better, even if it's just the thought of it, when times get rough. 

A cuddle and a cup of tea - that fixes many things!
A good joke  (OK, ok, here's the latest one I've heard... What do you call a donkey with three legs? A wonky....)
Pizza
Starting a good new book
Being productive  - cleaning can even help here!
A baby elephant smiling
Playing a game with my boyfriend - not that kind... even "I SPY works for us!
Jumping in puddles in my wellies
Spending time with my family
Baking a cake
Random stranger conversations which make me laugh. I was called 'babe' by a 70 year old school caretaker yesterday!
Walking through crunchy fallen leaves
Food in fun shapes
Pretty stamps (I don't collect them, but I love coming across them)

Simple things... 

And making a list is still considered 'writing', right?!

Check out Positive News online if you're having a touch day yourself - and then write about what inspires you!

I feel better already! Enjoy your weekend, guys!

Lou x

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