I’ve decided to take my debut novel down from Amazon. ‘Girl Meets Boys’, my internet age rom com was published in Autumn of 2010 and I had the aim of having just one stranger buy a copy. The books have sold better than I ever expected on both ebook and in paperback and I’ve made a surprising amount of cash, but it’s time for the party to end.

“But why?!” I hear you exclaim.

There are several reasons why I’m going to stop selling my novel online.

I stopped promoting ‘Girl Meets Boys’ about 18 months ago, with the thought that I can’t go on about it perpetually. People would get sick of hearing about it, I was sure! The mini book tour of local libraries and book shops stopped. I didn’t do the weekly mention of it on my Facebook and Twitter pages. I removed copies on display in local shops.

The main reason I’m taking the book down is that I am no longer proud of the publication. Don’t get me wrong, I was overjoyed when I held my first printed copy of the first book I’d ever written. I was excited with every sales figure update and grateful for every cheque which followed. But I know I can do better now. I don’t want this book to be a reflection of my writing abilities, as I feel I have progressed a long way since the date ‘Girl Meets Boys’ was published.

Sure, if I kept it available online I would sell some more copies, but I think I’d prefer to treat it as an achievement and work even harder on my current novel – my Next Big Thing, working title ‘Scrabble Pieces’.

My blogs, both here and at Born To Be A Tourist, are booming with visitor numbers, with new people discovering content and commenting every month. My monthly MK Pulse column is still being accepted with open arms, for which I am very grateful, and I am still writing the odd short story. I think I have enough on my plate writing-wise, even without ‘Scrabble Pieces’ text slowly crawling onto the page. I’ll soon have something back on Amazon to show you, guys! I’ll be removing the book from Amazon in July, so if you do still want to order a copy, go for it (and thanks!) - you have a month or so to grab one.

‘Girl Meets Boys’ will always have a little place in my heart, being my first novel, but it’s time has come and gone. Goodbye, and thanks for all the fish. 

Keep writing, and thanks for your on-going support for this blog. 

Lou x

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Many people's first reactions from this story are of anger, upset, panic, disbelief, fear.... The incident has certainly affected me, made me think; what would I have done if I'd have been there? What if it was one of my family involved? What does this mean for the UK, London and the War On Terror? How could anyone do this to another person?!?!

It's easy to get overwhelmed by it all, to be honest. Part of me wants to not read anything about the incident and to avoid the news so I don't see any graphic, disturbing footage. However, I feel it's better to know what is going on in the country and the world, even if it's horrific. But how to deal with the situation, to take it on board, but not to fall into the trap of fear?

I was reminded of something I heard during the Boston Marathon Bombings coverage. One woman, watching the breaking news on TV with her little boy was reported to have said the following tocomforting him:

This mother, having had to explain to her son what was going on, was encouraging him to look for the people helping others in a scene of chaotic terror, panic, atrocity and confusion. 

     Look for the men taking injured people into their arms and carrying them from danger. 

     Look for the people caught on scene attending to the injured, outside of an official medical 
     role. 


     Look for the children taking hold of their younger siblings hands and taking them to 
     safety. 


     Look for the good people helping strangers in an awful situation. 

This helps to restores your faith in humankind and remind you that there are some good people in the world, fighting for justice, looking after their fellow human beings. 

A great example of 'helpers' from yesterday's unimaginably brutal attack on the undeserving guy were the women at the scene who shielded the body - presumably from the media, from the road, from mobile phones from onlookers taking photos/videos, and possibly, more attacks. This was a brave and selfless thing to do and offered last respects to the victim - true 'helpers'. I heard about this on the radio driving home for lunch today and it moved me to tears. 

Maybe it was instinct which made the women stand up for the victim. Maybe they put themselves at risk because they were mothers. Maybe they just wanted to show a little respect to a fellow human being. 

Well done, ladies. 

I love my country but I know sometimes we are guilty of remembering the good guys. There are a lot of people who are negative about the UK, insular, ignorant, apathetic and even warmongering souls, who treat racism as a tool. We should be more like these courageous women who just happened to be caught up in the craziness. We cannot let intimidation and violence scare us into different ways of caring, thinking or living. Treat others as you would want to be treated - that was one of the rules we had at school. Some adults need to go back to school, I feel!

I remember something another mother, my mother, said when September 11th 2001 happened. It was advice to a 16 year old along the lines of "Do not be afraid. If we live our lives in fear, they [the terrorists] have won." 

Remember this today, and give your loved ones a hug when you get home tonight. This is a great country, and in times like this we need to remember that not all of us are in-human, weapon wielding lunatics. There is a lot of compassion in British people, and this needs to be remembered and celebrated. 'Helpers' are there. 

My thoughts are with the family and friends of the soldier, who has yet to be identified. May good prevail and justice be a quickly served. 

If you have been moved by this appalling incident - angered, tearful, fear, shame, compassion - please donate something to the Help For Heroes charity. The provide support for soldiers and families of soldiers killed in action. Yesterday, apparently, the HfH website crashed as people moved to donate, but please persevere - they'll fix it soon!

Have a lovely Bank Holiday weekend, UK readers (enjoy Monday at work, everyone else, mwahahaa!). If you have a quiet few minutes, maybe you should try to write about something that moves you, to get your passion and emotion flowing through your writing. 

Lou x

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Last week I buried my non-supermodel insecurities and had my photo taken professionally. I was a little bit nervous - I don't take the best photo normally! - but I'm here today to show you how simple an operation it can be, with great results. 

My photographer, David, and I did a few practice poses and worked out the best angle for my face, checked the lights, and sussed out which leg I feel more comfortable leaning on. We also discovered the tilted head look was beneficial, and got used to 'shoulders back, boobs out' look while looking relaxed.

Make sure you're showing off your book 

The obligatory shot - me with my current novel. This is 'Girl Meets Boys', my debut book. Note how the dress compliments the cover? I've thought about this - can you tell?!

Take a couple of copies of your book so you can fan them out, sit next to a pile of them, whatever takes your fancy. 

If you've written more than one, take them all - you never know when you might need some new shots including your previous publications. 

A tip for blinkers

If you find yourself blinking at the flash, like me, try this tip: close your eyes and get your photographer to count down from three. On two, smile. On three, open your eyes and your eyes will appear more fresh and less likely to blink. Take it from a notorious blinker, this works!

Don't just stand - use some props

The chair didn't work too well for me, as we didn't have a lot of physical space in the studio - hard, when you're trying to get both feet, all the body, some furniture in the shot, and no random doors or carpet!

Have you tried putting these props into your shots?

   - try a window, but watch the extra light
   - chaise lounge 
   - desk and chair - look like you're writing!
   - pillars or plinths you can lean against
   - comfy armchair
   - a stool - change up the seating arrangement 


Remember the jewellery

Plan your outfits before you go so you can bring the appropriate jewellery with you. You don't want to get dressed in the studio only to find you brought the gold bling when the dress you're wearing needs silver, the necklace you chose is too long for the neckline, or you forgot your statement ring you love with a particular simple outfit. And remember to take it home. I didn't. That's a 40 mile round trip my petrol tank doesn't need right now. 

Keep hydrated

Drink tea, squash, water... wine, if you're nervous! You'll concentrate longer and take direction better if you're keeping hydrated. 

Get triangular

Having lots of triangles in your shot if a good thing, I've learned. Make triangles by putting your hand on your hip, lean your chin on your fist, get an angle on your leg bending or straddle something to make another triangle, bend your arm into 2 sides of a triangle and let the air create the other side. 

Have fun and relax!

The more relaxed you are, the better the photos will be. Change it up. Doing something with my hands definitely relaxed me. I think it's related to how I like to dance with a drink in my hand.

Hands on hips worked - apparently a great pose for me; I just need to try not to look bossy! Play with your hem. Try smiling with and without teeth. Can you hold a pen and look...pensive? 

Now go find a photographer, set up a white background, and dim the lights. You can get that perfect author photo!

Lou x

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This week I welcome guest blogger Janet E. Cameron. She's a Dublin based Canadian author who can happily put her name against her novel 'Cinnamon Toast And The End Of The World'. In this short piece Janet shares how she was inspired by a Japanese souvenir and how writing a book can be compared to having a baby. 

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Daruma’s Other Eye

By Janet E. Cameron

If you go to any Buddhist temple in Japan at New Year’s, you’ll find Daruma dolls for sale. These are round figurines, usually made of papier-maché, depicting a grumpy-looking bearded man cloaked in red and gold with no arms or legs. The reference is to a monk called Bodhidharma who, according to legend, sat facing a wall in meditation for nine years. ‘And then his legs fell off!’ is the gleeful note the story ends on.

The first thing you notice about these dolls is that the eyes are blank, just staring white circles. This is because Darumas are meant to be used in setting goals for the new year. You colour in one of the eyes when you make your promise to yourself. Then, when you’ve achieved it, you colour in the other eye. So rather than scrawling down your resolutions on a scrap of paper and forgetting them, you’ll have a half-blind Daruma reproaching you from your shelf until you get your act together. On the flip side, looking at a Daruma with both his eyes coloured in gives a lifting sense of achievement.

Or so I imagine.

I lived in Japan for four years, and for three of them my apartment overlooked Sensoji, one of the most famous Buddhist temples in the country. At the end of December 2004 the area around my place was packed with stalls selling decorations and good luck charms for the new year: pine boughs, oranges, straw wreaths, lobster figurines painted with gold, an awful lot of chicken effigies (2005 was the year of the Rooster). On New Year’s Eve, I hit the streets with my Irish boyfriend to take in the atmosphere. People lined up to pray at the shrine in their winter kimonos, bought charms and hot saké from the vendors, chatted with friends. I accepted a very nice proposal of marriage. Three months later my boyfriend and I got married at Ueno City Hall, and then we were on a plane heading for Ireland. Two Daruma dolls from Sensoji were in our suitcases. 

I put the Darumas on the mantelpiece of our first apartment in Dublin and we each coloured in one eye. My husband wished for a decent job in the city. A few months later he was able to fill in his Daruma’s blank eye. I wished for the same thing. And then I got it. But…

I couldn’t bring myself to colour in that white circle. This particular goal didn’t seem big enough. I didn’t deserve to have a fully sighted Daruma on the shelf, not yet. I needed something more. 

Years passed. I got accepted to a master’s programme, went back to school, graduated. I finished the novel I’d started in 2010, Cinnamon Toast and the End of the World. I got an agent. Cinnamon Toast was accepted for publication. I dusted the half-blind Daruma every few weeks. 

I promised myself that I’d fill in the little guy’s other eye when Cinnamon Toast was printed and in my hands. That day came and went. When I saw it in a store, then. That would be the right time. It’s in stores all over Dublin. Now I’m telling myself that I don’t deserve a fully sighted Daruma until I’m sure the book will actually sell. 

Jesus H. Christ! That poor disgruntled red monk’s been missing an eye for EIGHT YEARS! What is it going to take for me to admit that I’ve accomplished something?

The truth is, I am one of those incredibly annoying people who find it difficult to acknowledge good fortune, although complaining is effortless and can go on forever. You hear so much about failures and flops: books, movies, marketing campaigns, perfectly nice space-alien cults that just didn’t work out. Why tempt fate by colouring in that eye? 

Except that fate doesn’t particularly care about what I do with my Japanese souvenirs. Why would I assume that it does? I blame those positive thinking gurus. Keep repeating ‘I’m wealthy’ and the money will appear. We’ve all heard it. I’ve even been told, straight-faced, that this is a great way to find a parking space. And while I’ve always suspected that the idea is a bit daft, I suppose part of me believes in it. Fate, Santa Claus, the Universe…they can hear your thoughts and they know if you’re plotting something naughty or nice. And if the universe really is standing outside my door poised to reward me for whatever I’m mentally affirming, why wouldn’t it be just as ready to give me a boot up the arse for my smugness and pride?

But there’s another, simpler, reason why I’m hesitating to give poor Daruma-san both his eyes. I lived in Cinnamon Toast land for several years. I rewrote and edited until I could practically stand up and recite the entire thing from memory. I know these characters better than I know my friends and family. It’s possible that I don’t want to say goodbye, and admitting that this task is finished would be doing just that. 

What am I doing instead? A lot of lurking. A lot of skulking. Checking the book’s stats obsessively online. Creeping into bookstores on my lunchbreak to spy on its progress. Worrying. Nail-biting. Rocking back and forth and hissing ‘my precious’ a lot. But this is normal, right? No, probably not. And it’s certainly not helping. 

I’ve heard people compare writing a book to giving birth to a baby. Yes, maybe. It is messy and painful and debilitating, and just about impossible to accomplish on your own. So sending your book to the marketplace must be like waving it goodbye on its first day of school. You can pack your kid’s lunch in the morning, walk her to the bus stop, help with homework, attend all the parent-teacher meetings. But you can’t follow her into the classroom and control what happens there. It’s out of your hands.

And, though I’m willing to do anything short of eating bugs on Youtube to sell this book, to a large extent it’s out of my hands as well. The story belongs to anyone who decides to read it now, and they can like it, hate it, or remain indifferent as they please. 

So, on this St Patrick’s Day, I’ll say, ‘Thank you, Ireland for giving me a place to write and a publisher for my story.’ And I’ll take my trusty marker and fill in that missing Daruma eye. In fact, I’m going to do it right now. 

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Thanks Janet - I loved the line 'The story belongs to anyone who decides to read it now'. All the best with your writing. 

Check out Jan's website at A Simple Jan or find her on Twitter. See you next week y'all, when I'll be showing you how even I can have a successful author photo shoot - and so can you!

Lou x

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SUCCESS!!!! I DID IT!!!

In case you didn't realise, April was a month of blogging A-Z for 26 days. I kept to my general writing theme (as with my normal weekly posts), with a few other random ones thrown in. I've had some wonderful feedback and great support from the A-Z community, so thanks for all of that. It really encouraged me to keep going, which was key; I didn't think I'd make it far past a week trying to keep up at the start!

I'm now returning to posting on Miss Write on Thursdays... and slightly missing the A-Z Challenge! Weird, huh? 

My first post post-A-Z Challenge is a summary of my ... A-Z posts. Did you miss any?!

A - 5 ways to survive film ADAPTATIONS
B - Robinson Crusoe - BOOK Review
C - Could you COPE without social media?
D - The DEVIL in me
E - How ENVIRONMENTALLY-FRIENDLY is being a writer?
F - FIVE books which inspired me
G - 'G' is for GOAL
H - 'H' is for the colour of HUNGER
I - 'I' is for IDEAS
J - Unusual words beginning with 'J'
K - 'K' is for (Stephen) KING
L - 'L' is for LIPSTICK
M - MY CHILDREN will do it differently
N - NAUGHTY & NICE
O - OWNING UP - Three things I hate about being a writer
P - How to write a PRESS RELEASE
Q - Best Scrabble words beginning with 'Q'
R - RENTING a room? 20 tips to protect yourself
S - If I were a SUPERHERO...
T - 'T' is for TIARA
U - I'm taking to U!
V - Very Short Fiction
W - 'W' is for W*llies - A cautionary tale
X - 'X' is for EX
Y - 'Y' is for (never) YIELD
Z - Zzz... How much sleep does a writer need?

Take a look on Twitter #AprilBlogChallenge to find other A-Z blogs worth checking in on. 

Thanks for reading through April. I hope you found some of the posts useful - even the random one about baking!

See you next week, 

Lou x

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