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I'm Journaling

26/5/2020

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I'm part of a mums wellbeing group and this week we've been tasked to start journaling.

This isn't a huge ask for me, as it's kind of like a paper blog, right up my street, especially when I have a pretty notebook to scribble in. We've been encouraged to do whatever we wish for content, just to record something every day to help with anxiety, depression, boredom etc during Lockdown. 

I know writing can be therapeutic - have even blogged about it in the past - but I hadn't realised just how good journaling can be for your mental and physical health.

For me, it helps me keep my brain ticking over while I'm not working. It's a fantastic outlet for emotions and can help with clarity. When I'm in a bad patch with my anxiety (thankfully not for several months now) I feel confused and foggy, and clarity is something I really need to work towards, so this really helps. 

On good days, like today, journaling helps me to appreciate the small things. Today I wrote down three  good things which came along today. 

1. I made a new type of sweet bread - Dulce Milanese. (Not worth the 6 hour prove and 25 mins of kneading!!)
2. The sunshine was amazing today.
3. I spoke to my grandma who's isolating with my uncle in Norfolk. 

It's easy to see here how journaling can really give you a boost. The blog on Positive Psychology says there's 83 benefits!!!!

https://positivepsychology.com/benefits-of-journaling/

Have you ever tried journaling? It doesn't have to be much, just listing three good things each day counts, but some people write poems, sketch, 'flow' write, do a diary... you can do whatever takes your fancy really, as long as you do it every day.

Stay well,

Lou x
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Stay home this weekend

7/5/2020

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It's Bank Holiday here in the UK this weekend and I'm begging you to all stay home.

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You may be tempted to visit beauty spots or family/friends, but don't. Stay safe, keep your family safe. Protect the NHS and save lives. 

There's much to be enjoyed at home and in this good weather, so make the most of it! 

We're planning a BBQ for the three of us, a replanting of seeds since the slugs got our veg, bread baking, and setting up the static exercise bike. If it's super nice, the paddling pool might even make an appearance!

Stay safe,

Lou x

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A more normal day

6/5/2020

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Following an uncomfortable and dramatic week, today I felt normal again. 


Following my appendicitis, my family and I are isolating to shield me for two weeks, so lockdown just got riiiiipe! Our dog has been packed off on holidays round the corner as we three are confined to the house and garden. It's been six days and it has been ok so far, to be honest. But then one often doesn't feel like doing much when feeling rough. This coming week will be more of a test, I think.

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Today, to make someone smile: I made yoghurt cranberry muffins for my husband's breakfast tomorrow. 

Today, for me: I did my first exercise since my hospitalization, and felt great for it, energised.

Today, to be productive, I cleared out my recipe books and put together two charity bags of clothes for when lockdown ends. 

Stay well,

Lou x
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How long will this go on for?

21/4/2020

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I had no doubt the original three week lockdown would be extended, and I reckon it'll  be done again. But I'm starting to wonder just how long this will and can go on...


Anyone else starting to feel like this is the new normal? Not seeing friends and family, no reliable deliveries, no outings, work all a-cock... 

I'm hearing a lot from other people about "things they've read" about how long lockdown  is going to last for. We obviously don't know for sure but the speculation makes me panic a bit. I haven't dared to think about not seeing my family for the whole summer... and into the Autumn. 

I normally see my mum (often my dad joins too) once a week and my brother probably every two weeks, that's what I'm missing the most. They're not walkable to where they live so I can't walk past and wave like I've done with some local friends. If I think about it more than a couple of seconds, it is hard to bear. 

I do try to remember though that El Husbandio's family permanently live away, in another country, I'm lucky to have my folks in reach easily normally, but it makes it hard to talk about with El Husbandio because he always trumps me by pulling the foreign card.

But, as someone else said to me today, at least we're  all safe and healthy. Best not to dwell on might happen and how, just keep on keeping on. 

---

Today's productivity: Did a trip to Costco for dog food and toilet paper, mainly, and dyed some boring white baby PJs blue and yellow.
 
Today's smile for someone else: I made soft, fluffy cheese and onion rolls for tea tonight, which El Husbandio loves. 

Today's thing for me: I took the dog out for a longer-than-normal walk in some fields we've not seen for a while. Rox was in the baby backpack, enjoying pulling my plaited hair and looking at the goats we found. A lovely afternoon. 

Lou x

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Even the most determined can fail sometimes

21/3/2020

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Day 5 of social isolation. Yesterday was hard, and my mental health struggled. 

Everyone's probably feeling some degree of anxiety and/or depression with this current situation. However, for those who struggle with mental health issues like this daily, whatever global crisis is or isn't happening,  it can be especially hard.

I'm one of those people and I found yesterday difficult. I put on a brave face for the online video nursery rhymes session I'm running, but I was in turmoil inside. I haven't got as many problems as some, and I try to keep it in perspective,  but anxiety doesn't make that easy. I have a healthy family. My husband is still able to work from home (something he often did anyway), so that's not changed much. We have toilet paper and food. But yesterday I was off kilter, out of sorts.

I was tearful, angry and frustrated. Mainly with things I can't control - like seeing my neighbours meet at someone's gate for a cigarette and a gossip, much less than the 2m recommended away from each other - and it was really upsetting.

I feel like life for my home-loving spouse hasn't changed a lot. His hobbies include cycling, dog walking,  and he enjoys a lot of things online, like the radio podcasts from his home country. All of that he can do still, no problem.  I, on the other hand, get cabin fever very quickly. I feel like I need a cuddle, and he doesn't really want to chat. I went for a long dog walk in the woods, which helped, but  there's nothing like a catch up with your best friend over coffee, girl talk, and I miss it!!!

So how do I plan to make today easier to manage, less emotional? 

​It's started well, with news of a newborn. Congratulations Becca and Diego, so happy for you! I have been up two hours and done loads of washing, cleaned the kitchen and 'done the necessarry' (feed and dress baby and me). We've had our morning story (twice, thank you Amazon for a fresh delivery,  The Tiger Who Came To Tea was today's choice) and baby is chilling while I have a coffee/blog break. Feels like a normal Saturday,  and being productive sure helps.

I've also stopped following local groups on Facebook who are clubbing together to help others. I initially wanted to help but food bank assistance with a 9 month old would be challenging, and the other things so far just seem to be people posting about what they need or are angry about. I don't need to see that. I offered a homebaked gluten free cake for anyone vulnerable and on a gluten free diet, but there were no takers. Added to that, i received a phonecall from some random woman in my postcode who was telling me to hot-foot it to Costcutters who have paracetamol in stock. I don't need paracetamol,  and didn't aprecise a panic call from a stranger. She'd got my number from the volunteers list who are supposed to be delivering groceries to those in need.... not what this was intended to be used for, spreading secret communications of grocery a bail ability! Concerned, I messaged the administration of the WhatsApp group for my postcode to let them know what happened, and they're going to set some ground rules for the group. I'm going to leave the group today, as I think I have enough to deal with with a baby and things here, and I'm now trying to avoid hearing things about Corona Virus. From today I am going to ignore my phone much more, and only check the news once a day. I think I'll rejoin the Facebook Corona Virus happenings when and if we actually need help.

Now, I've already done loads of productive things today (see yesterday's post for why this is imoortant) - time for something I enjoy,  for me. I'm going to download Now TV and enjoy their free trial. I heard Rocketman is on there, and I've wanted to see that for ages.

Enjoy your day, be safe.
​Lou x

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Mental Health in Isolation

20/3/2020

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If you've been following my blog you'll have noticed I'm an advocate of mental health awareness. Today's Corona Virus (diary?!) post is on exactly that: How to stay mentally healthy during social isolation.


Being isolated from your friends and family is tough. I live in the same town as my brother and my best mate, and we normally see each other a fair amount. Dog walks, movie nights, dinners, cinema trips, shopping, BBQs... All of which have stopped due to the need to socially isolate. Staying 2m from someone is difficult if you're serving up burgers!

So how am I protecting my mental wellbeing? I recognise I'm lucky having a husband home, a baby to engage with and a dog to walk, but this will be tough for 12 weeks,  potentially more.

1. I'm maintaining the normal dog walking schedule. We're not self isolating yet so  taking her out to places that aren't very busy is fine. Fresh air and exercise,  essential for mental health wellbeing!

2. I'm trying to help others where I can. An acquaintance of mine ran out of nappies at the weekend so I dropped some at her door. Today I'm baking a gluten free cake for someone vulnerable and gluten free. 

3. Checking in with my friends is helping, those I know who live on their own, who have children at home, my grandma (staying with my uncle, happily), and the two who are about to have a baby each - good timing eh?! A 10 min chat  on the phone does wonders.

4. A routine is helpful: We still do the morning dress/breakfast routine, the book, bath, snacks and bedtime routines, and again, walk the dog.

5. I'm mixing up activuties, both for me and for baby. We're moving rooms regularly,  she's having toy rotations, and I'm not just spending hours on Netflix. Variety is the spice of isolation life!

I'm also trying to maintain my daily wellbeing goals I was doing before we'd even heard of Corona Virus: I aim to do something productive and something that makes me happy each day. It's a shorter prompt compared to the FIVE WAYS TO WELLBEING - still worth a Google.  

For example, today I made a cake and hoovered (productive), and I sang with my baby (happiness injection).

Several of my mum friends, on chatting to them, have told me they try to do something for them, not something for the family or kids. This ranges from painting their toenails to having a nap, reading for 20 mins and a long hot bath. The key thing here is it's a relaxing activity, I think.

It all helps, keep well!

Lou x
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Pregnancy and Nosey Parkers

22/7/2019

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When I was pregnant with Rox, there were occasions where I felt like my body was not my own, both biologically but more importantly, publically. 


It was astounding to me how completely my body became all about concentrating on growing a new human; to a large extent and very quickly, I had no control over what it did when, how it functioned, and when I felt good. Added to that, I had more midwife appointments, monthly scans, and various examinations than the norm to check on me and baby, and an induced labour due to the gestational diabetes I developed from week 17. These appointments were often invasive and 'faffy', again, out of my control. 

This, to be honest, was all just par for the course, 100% needing to be done for the health of my baby and me. I was fine with that, Drs, get involved if you need to. When my body felt like it became fair game or visual/tactile/gossipy property of non-medical people I'd come across, that's when I took a bit of an issue. 

As Lindsay Hunter says, "pregnant women are on display. Suddenly, you are someone different. Something different. There’s a strange, infantilizing obsession that others get with a pregnant woman’s shape, her “bump.” This totally resonates with me. Three main occasions stick in my mind in particular of when people seemed to think they could do what they liked, say or ask what they wanted, or get involved in my pregnancy like it was their obsession and right...

1) A colleague I know a little - wouldn't call her even as much as a friend - asked me point blank over the tea point at work if I was constipated. Personal, much! I responded passive aggressively by filling her in COMPLETELY, leaving out no detail. Maybe she'll think twice before enquiring next time. Of all the side effects to ask about. Really. 

2) A stranger (to me, but a neighbour of my mother in law) I came across in the supermarket while helping my MIL shop felt she could try for a connection with the baby (kicks, I assume) by caressing my belly in the queue for the tills. Uninvited was not the word!!

3) Finally, postpartum, another stranger (friend of a friend that said friend and I bumped into while out for coffee) asked me last week - and this is a direct quote - "How's your fanny??" I shit you not. What a question! I'd be unlikely to ask even my closest frinds that, or is it just me??? And, ick, I hate that F word!

Now, if you've read any of my well-being themed blogs before, you know I don't have a problem sharing; I believe in normalising natural things (e.g. breastfeeding) and talking about important subjects, like mental health. Pregnancy is no exception. There's a lot of ignorance and some stigma around gestational diabetes in particular, and I am happy to share my experience, tips and to help people understand. However, there are some things you just do not do or ask someone you don't know well!

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Aside from uncomfortable conversations, this is also importantly linked to body image, the theme of Mental Health Awareness Week 2019. When (mostly) well-meaning people you come across touch you, advise you, or probe into your health because you're pregnant, it can make you feel a little self-conscious, even paranoid and worried. No one likes to be reminded of the fact they're carrying more weight, even if it is for the best reason in the world... I was pretty proud of my bump, in awe of my body as a first-time mum, but even I felt a bit weird when a banter-full colleague pointed out that my necklace (a whale tail pendant) matched my body. I wasn't even that big, actually losing weight while preggo! 

Your body is no one's business but your own, so don't feel like you need to grace inappropriate questions and comments with a reply ... or perhaps have a good answer ready to ping back at them. The same goes for invasive touching. If you're not comfortable with people touching your belly, tell them. I had a language barrier in my case, but I still could have removed the woman's hands from my tummy - that would have needed no translation! 

Just because you're having a baby it doesn't make you fair game for public involvement and prying into your health and bodily experiences. Respect and consideration should still be applied. And ladies, remember you're in control here, where as in a lot of the 'joy' of pregnancy you may feel you're not. I certainly didn't - my body was at the mercy of hormones from the diabetes to late-stage emotional outbursts, and I couldn't do anything about it.

If you need yet another reason to be positive about your changing body and to feel like it's YOU who owns it, not any random passer by, take a look at this (American) quick read on how your body image perception can have lasting well-being effects on you and your child. Food for thought. 

And FYI, my 'fanny' is fine. Thanks for your kind concern.

Lou x

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Born to be a Tourist

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Confidence Is Everything

11/6/2019

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I've been inspired to write about confidence this week. following a long conversation with a good friend about it. 

Confidence is beneficial in many or most elements of life: Your love life, as a parent, social situations, work, driving, in the kitchen, even! It's truly got it's fingers in everything. However, even the best of us have a dip every now and then. I've always been a confident person, in so many ways. Some examples...

   - Even when I was a kid I'd chat to strangers in the supermarket
   - I enjoy traveling alone, including as far-flung places as New Zealand
   - In social situations I am chatty, energetic, and I enjoy meeting new people
   - I've done several things a lot of people have commented that they'd be petrified of doing (e.g. chopping off my long hair, caving, a trapeze swing)

But what does all this matter if one day you suddenly lose your confidence? Perhaps you're going through a relationship breakdown. Perhaps you had a fender-bender recently and are more cautious behind the wheel. Perhaps some feedback at work has left you feeling deflated and useless. It could happen. 

Today I'm going to compare my confidence from three years ago to today. 

Three years ago I lost my job. I was already on mild-ish medication for low mood and anxiety, and having counselling once a week (both of which were helping), but this really took my last ounce of confidence away. I remember having my final counselling session two days after I became unemployed. What timing! I was quick to book in some more sessions, let me tell you! That week I had lost more than my income; I lost my circle of work 'mates' (the ' marks are telling, but that's another story!), my routine, my ability to share financial burdens at home, and I realised having never not worked since I was 21, working had become part of my identity. I was also extremely worried how the rest of my life would work out after this sudden blank space appeared on my previously full and interesting CV, and quickly felt like I was turning into a distrusting recluse, unsure how I'd ever get back to work. 

Fast forward to now, and I'm on maternity leave - again, not in work (I'm a week from my due date when the 'real' work begins!), but it feels totally different. I have learned so much about myself in the past three years, my life has grown, and I'm back to my normal confident self. I'm fully aware I'm not 'normal me' at the moment with hormones, sleep patterns, and a changed physical state, but it makes an interesting snapshot. 

(Totally stole this chart idea from Paul, who writes a fantastic blog on mental health. Keep it up, bud! Check out his post about confidence here.)

The chart below is indicative of how I felt three years ago in relation to things which can affect your confidence (can you tell I'm missing work a little, hello Excel!).

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​And the following chart is how I am feeling now...

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These tables were more of an exercise for me to compare 2016 to 2019 personally, but I thought it may be useful to include. ​What a difference a couple of years makes. I can see some significant changes straight away, the impact of me losing my job and becoming more confident again in a temporary but positive pause in a working life. The biggest changes have been my use of voice and my growth in personal emotional awareness. Financially, again, it's tight, but for a positive reason this time, and being reminded I'm doing a good, responsible job of being pregnant by friends and family, midwives, my husband, is an incredible boost. Sometimes it can be hard to see or remember. I am learning to avoid comparisons with others - who knows how confident they feel themselves? Who knows what their real story is?

This has also reminded me of one of my favourite mantras. It may take some work but
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Whatever situation, circumstance, body confidence or emotional crisis, it will eventually pass. Sometimes it needs a little encouragement, some changes, perhaps some personal training to improve your appearance or attitude, but things beyond your control will pass too. 

Missing confidence for me more recently has been more around feeling like I'm not good enough at work, no matter how many times I'm thanked or told I'm doing great. I am sure this feeling will be something I'll  experience as a first-time mum, so it's great to be aware that I can have a tendency to feel like that.  

Right now, confidence-wise it's mainly wonderingments. If that's a word. Will I be a good mum, that's the crux. It's all new to me (us), and many, if not most, new parents will not be able to avoid thinking or worrying about what the future holds for their new arrival. 

The second point I want to highlight is that some of these factors affecting confidence are controllable. Recording your achievements (however small) can help. Keeping on top of weight gain and some new clothes can do wonders for your self-esteem. Others are less in your field of control, like your upbringing, but simple awareness of the factors can make a little difference. 

I've also been lucky to be friends with and work with people don't make me feel like I need to be anyone but myself. 

​Remind yourself of and keep doing things that make you feel confident. Stand tall and know you are a capable person worthy of love!

I guess it would be interesting to see how confident I feel going back to work in a year's time... 

This blog didn't go the way I was planning, so I'm sorry if it's a bit rambly. My brain is clearly out of practice with thinking through big ideas and constructing coherent text at the moment!

Hopefully next time we speak I'll be a mum. One week to go!

Lou x

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Born to be a Tourist

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Four Favourite Keto Bakes

27/5/2019

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Looking for sugar-free and low carb desserts? Here are four of my favourites, saving you the hassle of trial and error I embarked on - and no chalky chocolate cake in sight! 


I've been on a sugar-free, extremely low carb diet (almost keto) since mid-January due to my gestational diabetes (it's a joy...). The hormones in my body decided I won't be able to process most forms of sugar while I'm pregnant fairly early on, so I've had time to try out a few new things. It can be hard to find tasty desserts and cake that isn't chalky when your diet is this limited, so maybe this will help one or two readers. Let me know what you think!

Photos are from the respective websites

No Bake Cookies

These no bake cookies from Stacey at Soccer Mom Blog went down a treat. Great on their own, or a cheeky dollop of cream. They're quick to make, have the added depth of flavour of peanut butter, and you can feel really smug knowing they're not at all bad for you!
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Fudgy Brownies

Brenda, from the USA, AKA Sugar-Free Mom has a brilliant recipe for gluten, dairy and sugar-free brownies, and they're gooooood, especially if you like yours fudgy. The beans replace the flour, and they are one of the few keto-friendly desserts without coconut in them, if that's not your thing. Obviously with no flour, they don't rise, so be prepared for a shallow bake or use a smaller traybake tin. 
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Carrot Cake

This was my favourite find. It's hard to find things which aren't chocolate based, but this carrot cake was delicious and I've made it repeatedly when I needed a baked goods fix. A great addition to the breakfast table, even, it's so not naughty! You can tell it's not so sweet, but it's by far and away the best keto cake I've come across. I didn't make the frosting and it was still great. Thanks to Maya, the blogger here!
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Chocolate Bark

Yes, you can still eat chocolate on a low sugar low carb diet! I buy Nick's sugar-free chocolate from Amazon, and it worked amazingly in this chocolate bark recipe from Jennifer Banz. Ultra quick, simple ingredients, and a bit of a novelty (or it was at the picnic I took it to). Just watch it doesn't melt on the picnic table in this gorgeous sunshine we've been having!
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I've got just three weeks until Baby V is due but I fully intend on continuing to bake mainly less sugary and lower carb recipes. These treats will be a regular in our house even after the pregnancy diabetes has gone!

Why not follow Stacey, Jennifer, Maya and Brenda's blogs, there's a great collection of recipes to be enjoyed. Thanks ladies!

Lou x

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I Am Me!

16/5/2019

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This week is Mental Health Awareness Week, and I've invited a long-time friend of mine (another Louise!) to guest blog about her experiences of mental health. Take it away, Lou G!
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When I was asked to write a piece for Miss Write during Mental Health Awareness Week (#mentalhealthawarenessweek) I couldn't turn it down.
 
This week is one dedicated to breaking through the stigma that's attached to discussing mental health issues, and educating those who are still learning about how mental health affect people differently.
 
The hardest thing for me isn't how to write this piece, but where to start. Which story to share. I may only be in my mid-30's but life's thrown a few challenges my way and I have had many a battle with my own mental health.
 
From a young age, I remember being seen as different. I was loud, quirky, weird and a bit eccentric. An overly enthusiastic kid with a side of harmless trouble thrown in for good measure. Teachers and other parents were a bit wary of this crazy ball of energy bouncing around the classroom.
 
Luckily I was a pretty hardy soul, comments went over my head whilst I distracted myself with the next shiny thing that drew in my interest. The problem is that as you get older, you become aware of what people are saying and thinking about you. No one took interest in WHY I was maybe like that. It's just how I was, so I grew to accept this too. 
 

Be yourself, everyone else is taken - Oscar Wilde
​
​Of course, there are dark days for someone who is unsure of why they are the way they are, why they have burnouts, why people take a step back from you or treat you differently. As I grew up, this led to bouts of depression.
 
It didn't matter what I tried, I could join all the societies and clubs, run toddler groups as I entered motherhood, join the PTA and more. I would be known as the YES and the IDEAS lady. Want something done, ask Louise, she will probably have the energy to do this. Want some good ideas about how to fix a problem? Louise will probably have 100 ideas and again, being the YES lady, she will probably offer to run every one of them herself too.
 
And in my bid for acceptance, I did it ALL....  This ended up being more detrimental to my mental health than I realised, and a link that I failed to spot myself.
 
Everything I signed up to was attacked with every ounce of energy I had, to the point once a project was finished I suffered serious burnout. I was so keen to please and be accepted and people to say, WOW; that's the sort of person we want as a friend, not just as a dogs body... that I just kept going.
 
My husband would step in and try to warn me, seeing negative patterns in my behaviour, but unfortunately for him, I was in denial there was anything else going on. I just liked to be busy and wanted people to need me and the excitement of running all these projects I found addictive.
 
Two years ago I started to see some behaviour in my youngest daughter that I recognised. She was struggling to find her place within school, the kids were wary of her overly creative storytelling and enthusiasm, the teacher was calling me to complain she was distracted in class and was concerned it was due to her being mentally incapable of doing the work (just to clarify here, she was being expected to sit and trace and colour in alphabet letters for ten minutes, something she had been doing since the age of two and that she was bored to death with doing...). 
 
Not only did I feel upset for her, but it took me back to my own childhood. I could see the whole thing playing out again. Parents weren't encouraging of their children being friends with a kid that may encourage their own kids to become distracted and a little on the weird side.
 
I knew there was something more to it, and luckily, worldwide, there is now a better acceptance and understanding of kids who maybe were struggling in school due to being different. I pushed for an assessment. If anything I didn't want my daughter to go through the same unnecessary challenges as I went through if there were answers available.
 
As we sat with the doctor, they noted the pattern I was expressing through my own journey and my daughters and asked me if I had ever thought about getting an assessment. It had never occurred to me that it would still be relevant, I was 34 and had managed so far without an assessment... Yes, I was still doing all the things above, still heavily distracted, disorganised, prone to burnout and depression, but I hadn't even considered my own mental health was worth looking into...
 
A few months later I was being told I displayed very strong signs of having adult ADHD and a very mild form of bipolar. I was in shock at first... would I now be expected to go on drugs to help me manage myself? I was a bit freaked out to be honest. I had lived my whole life without medication and I wasn't planning on my own daughter (who also got diagnosed with ADHD) taking medication for something that I hoped we could try and work through.
 
What I have I done to try and help myself? The same things I would suggest to anyone, no matter what mental health issues they are battling.
 
* Learn who you are
 
Taking the time to understand yourself is VERY important. No matter if you have bouts of depression, suffer from loneliness, anxiety, or maybe something more pronounce: take time for YOU to understand why and if there are any underlying reasons.
 
* Accept yourself
 
YES!!! Sometimes I am a bit mental or different and that's ok!
 
* Believe it
 
Yes, I am repeating the comment above but as I shared in my own journey, I thought I did accept myself.  Even though I had this basic acceptance of myself I still found myself falling over at the same hurdles time and time again. 

​Today you are are you, this is truer than true, there is no one else that is 'youer' than you - Dr Seuss. 

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*A diagnosis is ok
 
There's still so much stigma attached to going to the doctors and asking for help. We are all human, but some people would be more likely to go to the doctors for minor aches and pains than they would for something as important as mental health and well being. It's not irrelevant or less worthy than physical well being!
 
*Own it
 
The more people who can stand up and say they are living with or have gone through a journey with their own mental health, the more it helps others come forward and talk about their experiences and maybe, seek help. The less we hide away from mental health issues and discard its importance of being accepted worldwide as an OK subject to talk about freely, the more we normalise it and can help people find the confidence to continue the discussion. By owning a bigger understanding of yourself, you give yourself the chance to set more realistic limits, goals and boundaries for yourself.
 
*Mindfulness
 
I HATE this word, but what I would say instead is take time for you. Not to go shopping or do errands you normally do all day, but do things to let your head calm down. 

Read a book. Sit in the sunshine with your eyes closed, feeling the sun on your skin and listening to the world around you. Watch a thunderstorm. Be aware of others around you, open your eyes. 

Everyone has their own story, their own journey, be mindful of that. You may feel alone but you are surrounded by many who are also going through their own journeys too.
 
*Never use it as an excuse
 
If your mental well being has affected others, be aware of that and make it right. Your behaviour could have a knock on effect to others, and as I've said above, you can't understand anyone else's journey fully, but you are responsible for your own. Mental Health is never an excuse to be cruel or mean to someone. You of all people know the power of an encouraging word or a hug, a smile and know how an angry face when you are feeling down can be the thing that causes you to break, and feel worse. BE 'MINDFUL' OF THAT.
 
Through an acceptance of myself I am hoping that I have found myself a happier place. I have connected online with other adults with ADHD to see how they have managed their own journeys. Being self-aware has given me the tools to take little steps in finding a better life balance for myself.
 
If I volunteer to do something, I do it not for the praise of others or the need of their adoration, friendship or the desire of feeling wanted. I do it because I want to and because I want to feel my own self-worth. I'm also very aware that being busy all the time isn't THE answer.

I am sure life will still find a way to present me new challenges, new adventures. But for now, I'm happy to know, that I quite like me, especially now I know who I am.

​Life is a journey and most journeys include ups and downs, right paths, wrong paths, moments of feeling lost or moments of absolute joy. Not all of us walk the same path, some of us are lucky enough to have our paths cross each other, to share a moment in that journey together. 

Above all, this is YOUR journey and YOU are responsible for the direction you take it, so if you can, try and make sure to enjoy the little things and appreciate where you have been and all you have achieved. 

Louise Gooding
Find me on Twitter @OnceUponALouise

---

Thanks chick, great stuff! I can certainly relate to "busy = happy" ... An attitude I learned to fight against a few years back. A good reminder.

Find out more about Mental Health Awareness Week here, and be well!

Lou x
​
Find me on Facebook
...and on Twitter
Born to be a Tourist

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    I'm a writer based in South Wales, with an unhealthy obsession with stationery and baking. I mainly blog for my own sanity, but I'm also working on a novel. Still. 

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