A friend of mine is running an anthology submission competition and she asked me to contribute. It was on a subject I'd not normally write about - sex - and, being a personal story, I chose to write in disguise under a different name. Initial feedback on my honest piece is more than encouraging, so I hope it makes the final cut of the book. 

​How did I choose my (secret!) pen name? I could have used a pen name generator, but that's so impersonal, I think. I still wanted to hang onto a bit of me, even if I was in disguise.

There is a former footballer with a sexy, strong sounding last name, so I pinched that. I think my married and maiden names were both strong, so that was pretty important to me. I always thought Louise XXXX sounded good, so I've kept my first name featured in my pen name, just changing the surname. It still feels a bit like me that way.  

Other ideas I had: 

1. Something inspired by a favourite film or actor of mine... Perhaps Louise Trinity (The Matrix), L Miller (We're The Millers), Louise Everdeen in homage to the awesome Jennifer Lawrence in Hunger Games...

2. I'm a country music fan so Louise Cash, Osbourne, Rogers or Swift? 

3. My favourite book for a long time was Rebecca ~ Daphne Du Maurier - I'm not so keen on Daphne but Rebecca  could have worked as a first name. 

4. Maps have always been fascinating to me - a true geographer! - so I considered incorporating something from my local area. The area of Bristol I'm currently living in is called Lawrence Weston, but that would make me a man. A step too far for a disguise??

5. Wildlife inspired - how about using Lark, Wren, Daisy, or Poppy as a first name? I did quite warm to Lark, being another strong sounding name, but I'm not sure how plausible that is, not having known of anyone named that. 

How would you go about choosing a pen name?

Lou x

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Born to be a Tourist

Lockdown has had an affect on our types of waste and the behaviours we display around getting rid of our waste. For example, who could have predicted 5 months ago that so many face masks would be dropped into supermarket bins as people exit the building? I certainly didn't have any face masks at home in February, but we have a stash now, ready for whenever the weekly shop is called for. 

Even during the pandemic, it's important to remember to AVOID, REDUCE, REUSE, and RECYCLE your waste. The environment can't take a 'messy break' and litter, waste and pollution are not something to allow just because "times are unprecedented". Through lockdown, more single use plastic has been used, in an effort perhaps by people trying to reduce their contamination risks. This is often things like

 - plastic cutlery and plates on picnics and in school canteens, when reusable ones from home would be easy to take instead, and easily washed to use again. 

- delivery packaging from supermarkets. If you've been lucky enough to 'bag' *ahem* a supermarket delivery slot, you may have noticed they are not using reusable containers anymore, and are relying on plastic carrier bags a lot more. 

- takeaway containers not only from your normal Chinese or fish and chips shop, but also from restaurants and cafes who are now offering a new 'lockdown' takeaway service. Most of these are (recyclable) plastic or (non-recyclable) polystyrene containers, many of which are not disposed of properly when the meal is over. 

The reduced choice and availability in supermarkets has also contributed to the issue. Many people who would have chosen the 'plastic free' produce now have now option but to buy the cellophane wrapped broccoli and the huge 1kg bag of carrots instead of buying loose. 

​Masks are a new challenge in waste generation circles: A growing demand (which will continue to grow next week with it becoming compulsory to wear masks in supermarkets), a complex material, and a very visible one when some people simply cannot be arsed to dispose of them properly. Some people even have been flushing them down the toilet.

Masks need to be put responsibly in the bin; They are made from a mix of materials, including plastics, and cannot be recycled. Masks often end up thrown on the floor when used, left available for wildlife to eat and to create an eyesore in public areas. I know I've seen some on the pavements in my local area, and in green areas...

​And marine pollution doesn't escape either. The Guardian reported 'more masks than jellyfish' recently. 

How can we combat this?

- Report littering and flytipping to your local council. You can often just fill out a quick form online and they generally clear up the issue within a few days, if you're lucky. 

​- Social media the hell out of irresponsible plastic littering! I found this on Instagram recently, specifically for plastic gloves litter on beaches >>>

 - It is still safe to litter pick, if you wish, but I'd strongly recommend using gloves and a litter-picker if possible (the grabbing stick kind). 
​
​- Now the recycling centres are open again, make full use of them if your recycling is overflowing. This will leave more space in your refuse bin for things like masks and rubber gloves which cannot be recycled. 

- Make sure your mask is binned - and stays in the bin! If the bin is overflowing, take it home with you and dispose of it there.

 - Use reusable masks 

On the plus side, waste carrier Veolia has reported a 30% increase in recycling since lockdown began, and the materials are 'cleaner' too, with fewer waste items contaminating the bins and boxes. This is a big win, let's hope it continues!

​You may have seen this striking photo from Oceans Asia. Possibly does more with the image than my 100s of words here. 

Throw nature a bone - not a mask - and dispose of your waste properly, folks!

Lou x

Yes, I know, some are submarines and the pretzel holes are far from defined, but they tasted perfect. Yum yum! One more from the buns of the world baking book!

 This is my last Lockdown post. I feel like all that's missing from 'before' is the social distancing, the 2m rule still being advised. It's feeling doubly like the end of lockdown as I'm working again, albeit returning from mat leave, and only upstairs in the spare room, but still, feels like a new beginning.

​Honestly, on meeting friends, once we got over thebinitial 'can't hug hello', a walk or a cuppa continues as normal, especially now we're allowed indoors. Still waiting for the cinemas to re-open, personally, but it's not bothering me much at all nowadays. Hope you're feeling similarly!

My final wellbeing lockdown challenge looked like this yesterday...

Something for me: Online zumba class
Something to make someone else smile: Pretzels for friends and neighbours
Productivity: The pretzels - they took forever to make!

Lou x

The local fruit trees are just coming into season, but I'd never noticed the cherries before. I picked exactly one cup's worth too, on a whim, and that's exactly what I needed for a recipe I found later that afternoon. 

I have never baked (or indeed, tasted) cherry scones with fresh fruit before, but these are YUMMY. The dough was really wet, which made rolling it out and using a cutter impossible, but I 'blobbed it' on a baking tray and they came out pretty well. 

Ooh look, it's time for afternoon snack. 

​Lou x

Lockdown Wellbeing:

Productivity: See above
Make myself happy: Enjoyed having a coffee in the garden with my brother this afternoon. 
Made someone else smile: I delivered a chococlate cake to my very pregnant friend. 

I'm going back to work this week after 13 months of maternity leave, and I am full of emotions. I've thoroughly enjoyed being a new mum and having so much time looking after Rox. Honestly, if we could afford it, I wouldn't be going back to work. Consequently it's been a bit of an emotional time lately, and I've felt pressured to 'enjoy the time' I have left with Rox, even through the limits of lockdown. 

Here's a few of the things which have been playing on my mind...

 - Will I remember  what I need to for my role? My brain is a bit mushy right now!
 - Will my new mum crowd drift away?
 - Will our childcare plan work out well? This involves El Husbandio having Rox two days in a row, he'll be learning fast!
 - Will I be as good as my team expect or remember me to be?
 - Is there anything I should do before I return to work to help Rox's development? To enjoy myself?
 - Why are me and El Husbandio at each other this week?
 - How will domestic duties be split now I won't be as available?
 - How will home working work when both of us are in the office?

So many things on my mind!

I had a bad day today with all this - and more - going round my brain. I realised I felt 

This is a bit of a lethal combination for me, the Big Three. These feelings do dominate when I'm having a rough time. Spotting I felt this way is a HUMUNGOUS achievement for me, given I had no emotional awareness a couple of years back. I've worked hard to recognise my emotions and to help let them be and pass, if they're not helpful. 

I didn't want to reflect any more. It was getting too much.

I took some deep breaths. . 
I spent some time in the garden alone. 
I reminded myself I'll still be a mum forever, it's not ending. 
I thought of the near future, how exciting it'll be when Rox is walking, talking...
I made a mental list of all the great things Rox and I are planning for the next year.
I reminded myself that I like my boss, my job, I'm going to go back to having a monthly income. 

And this helped enormously. I start work on Wednesday, and I don't feel terrible about it. Now I feel

  Proud
  Relaxed
  Sad

I'm immensely proud of what I've achieved this year, relaxed about going back to work (slowly does it, it'll feel normal before long), but still a little bit sad still I won't have my little shadow by my side all day. 

And that's ok. 

​Lou x

Something possessed me and I couldn't turn the oven off. I've just kept going since Sundays major charity bake, it seems!!

The rolls are linseed and oat (for tea), the buns are almond sponge with cherries for decoration (reminds me of my grandma), and the carrot cake is egg free - vegan, actually - as my baby can't eat egg. No photo of that, it doesn't look very interesting at all, I was running out of time to make lunch by this point!

So there's my productivity ticked off for today...
For myself... I participated in a weekly quiz my mum friends and I do, and I won, even with the theme of TV! I don't watch much soni wasnt hopeful, but yay!
And to make someone else smile, Rox and I played for ages with the Paw Patrol sit-on car we have, making the lights flash, the sounds blare, and riding on top. Love her laugh!!

Lou x

I promised you photos!

My kind friends and family helped me to raise £175 for this worthy cause. It was exhausting and delivering them all in Bristol took some time, but I really enjoyed it. I have a feeling my home baking business 280 Bakes will be back this year! 

Thank you again to all who donated xxx

Lou x

The recipe was massive, so I batched up half of them and posted them to a friend's parents who needed a hug in the post. Hopefully they arrived in one piece!

Productivity - boom!
Making someone smile - I walked the neighbour's dog because he's sick.
Something for me - I sat down and read a huge chunk of my current book, Freakonomics. 

Lou x

This photo reminds me of a great day we had as a family recently during Lockdown. We cycled out to Severn Beach and back, with a picnic in a field on the way. The dog ran the whole way - about 10 miles! - and we had a lovely time. 

You don't have to go for to feel like you're some place totally new and away from home, sometimes. 

Lou x

I made huge strides last year in going plastic-free. We started having a milkman, buying soap in bulk, using laundry soap nuts and much, much less cling film. 

Finding the right shampoo and conditioner has been a hard mission to complete, but I've finally done it. My hair is fairly dry and curly, frizzy if I don't use a serum or mousse. It's never been oily, happily, and I was using a scaled down version of the Curly Girl Method with liquid products before I moved to bars. I would wash my hair twice a week and condition every night. That soon changed.

LUSH - 3/10
I started on a whim at a Lush store. The staff recommended a 'jungle' shampoo bar and a curly hair friendly conditioner. These smelled good but were both TERRIBLE. The bars didn't  lather up at all and I felt like I wasn't putting anything at all in my hair... which didn't feel especially clean afterwards and got greasy quickly. Added to that, I found them a little more expensive, but justified that by saving on postage by grabbing a bar when I was at the Mall anyway. However, the colours weren't too nice and there was very limited selection.

SUDSMK - 5/10
I totally fell in love with this small home based business. The owner lives a few houses down from where I used to live, for one thing! Anyway, the bars from Suds were better at lathering up some soap but still not much. After around 3-4 weeks my hair adjusted and wasn't  greasy any longer, but El Husbandio not-so-tactfully said my hair smelled like an old mop. Thanks. I hadn't noticed so it couldn't be THAT bad, could it?! My main problem with these bars was the bogey-looking lumps they left behind in the tub after a wash. Ick. One plus point has been added just because when your delivery arrives, the artisan maker has handwritten an inspirational feel-good quote on the box. Nice touch!

ETHICAL SUPERSTORE - 9/10
Until now, I thought I'd just have to settle with a 5/10 satisfaction level. I now use a shampoo from Faith in Nature and a conditioner from Friendly Soap, both available at Ethical Superstore - the same place I get my soap nuts, so I can whack it all on one delivery charge, too. The bars are £5.79 and £4.95 respectively, very reasonable, and they're a clean white/cream colour with no lumpy bits. They both lather up properly, and have a decent level of scent. 

My shampooing has increased in frequency (now every other day) but these bars last so well, and conditioning every day keeps on top of any grease building up. 

Find the bars here >> https://www.ethicalsuperstore.com/category/beauty-health-and-wellbeing/hair-care/

I'm proud to be plastic-free and all natural with my shampoo and conditioner! I've already started giving bars as gifts, look out, friends and family!

Lou x