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I Am Me!

16/5/2019

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This week is Mental Health Awareness Week, and I've invited a long-time friend of mine (another Louise!) to guest blog about her experiences of mental health. Take it away, Lou G!
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When I was asked to write a piece for Miss Write during Mental Health Awareness Week (#mentalhealthawarenessweek) I couldn't turn it down.
 
This week is one dedicated to breaking through the stigma that's attached to discussing mental health issues, and educating those who are still learning about how mental health affect people differently.
 
The hardest thing for me isn't how to write this piece, but where to start. Which story to share. I may only be in my mid-30's but life's thrown a few challenges my way and I have had many a battle with my own mental health.
 
From a young age, I remember being seen as different. I was loud, quirky, weird and a bit eccentric. An overly enthusiastic kid with a side of harmless trouble thrown in for good measure. Teachers and other parents were a bit wary of this crazy ball of energy bouncing around the classroom.
 
Luckily I was a pretty hardy soul, comments went over my head whilst I distracted myself with the next shiny thing that drew in my interest. The problem is that as you get older, you become aware of what people are saying and thinking about you. No one took interest in WHY I was maybe like that. It's just how I was, so I grew to accept this too. 
 

Be yourself, everyone else is taken - Oscar Wilde
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​Of course, there are dark days for someone who is unsure of why they are the way they are, why they have burnouts, why people take a step back from you or treat you differently. As I grew up, this led to bouts of depression.
 
It didn't matter what I tried, I could join all the societies and clubs, run toddler groups as I entered motherhood, join the PTA and more. I would be known as the YES and the IDEAS lady. Want something done, ask Louise, she will probably have the energy to do this. Want some good ideas about how to fix a problem? Louise will probably have 100 ideas and again, being the YES lady, she will probably offer to run every one of them herself too.
 
And in my bid for acceptance, I did it ALL....  This ended up being more detrimental to my mental health than I realised, and a link that I failed to spot myself.
 
Everything I signed up to was attacked with every ounce of energy I had, to the point once a project was finished I suffered serious burnout. I was so keen to please and be accepted and people to say, WOW; that's the sort of person we want as a friend, not just as a dogs body... that I just kept going.
 
My husband would step in and try to warn me, seeing negative patterns in my behaviour, but unfortunately for him, I was in denial there was anything else going on. I just liked to be busy and wanted people to need me and the excitement of running all these projects I found addictive.
 
Two years ago I started to see some behaviour in my youngest daughter that I recognised. She was struggling to find her place within school, the kids were wary of her overly creative storytelling and enthusiasm, the teacher was calling me to complain she was distracted in class and was concerned it was due to her being mentally incapable of doing the work (just to clarify here, she was being expected to sit and trace and colour in alphabet letters for ten minutes, something she had been doing since the age of two and that she was bored to death with doing...). 
 
Not only did I feel upset for her, but it took me back to my own childhood. I could see the whole thing playing out again. Parents weren't encouraging of their children being friends with a kid that may encourage their own kids to become distracted and a little on the weird side.
 
I knew there was something more to it, and luckily, worldwide, there is now a better acceptance and understanding of kids who maybe were struggling in school due to being different. I pushed for an assessment. If anything I didn't want my daughter to go through the same unnecessary challenges as I went through if there were answers available.
 
As we sat with the doctor, they noted the pattern I was expressing through my own journey and my daughters and asked me if I had ever thought about getting an assessment. It had never occurred to me that it would still be relevant, I was 34 and had managed so far without an assessment... Yes, I was still doing all the things above, still heavily distracted, disorganised, prone to burnout and depression, but I hadn't even considered my own mental health was worth looking into...
 
A few months later I was being told I displayed very strong signs of having adult ADHD and a very mild form of bipolar. I was in shock at first... would I now be expected to go on drugs to help me manage myself? I was a bit freaked out to be honest. I had lived my whole life without medication and I wasn't planning on my own daughter (who also got diagnosed with ADHD) taking medication for something that I hoped we could try and work through.
 
What I have I done to try and help myself? The same things I would suggest to anyone, no matter what mental health issues they are battling.
 
* Learn who you are
 
Taking the time to understand yourself is VERY important. No matter if you have bouts of depression, suffer from loneliness, anxiety, or maybe something more pronounce: take time for YOU to understand why and if there are any underlying reasons.
 
* Accept yourself
 
YES!!! Sometimes I am a bit mental or different and that's ok!
 
* Believe it
 
Yes, I am repeating the comment above but as I shared in my own journey, I thought I did accept myself.  Even though I had this basic acceptance of myself I still found myself falling over at the same hurdles time and time again. 

​Today you are are you, this is truer than true, there is no one else that is 'youer' than you - Dr Seuss. 

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*A diagnosis is ok
 
There's still so much stigma attached to going to the doctors and asking for help. We are all human, but some people would be more likely to go to the doctors for minor aches and pains than they would for something as important as mental health and well being. It's not irrelevant or less worthy than physical well being!
 
*Own it
 
The more people who can stand up and say they are living with or have gone through a journey with their own mental health, the more it helps others come forward and talk about their experiences and maybe, seek help. The less we hide away from mental health issues and discard its importance of being accepted worldwide as an OK subject to talk about freely, the more we normalise it and can help people find the confidence to continue the discussion. By owning a bigger understanding of yourself, you give yourself the chance to set more realistic limits, goals and boundaries for yourself.
 
*Mindfulness
 
I HATE this word, but what I would say instead is take time for you. Not to go shopping or do errands you normally do all day, but do things to let your head calm down. 

Read a book. Sit in the sunshine with your eyes closed, feeling the sun on your skin and listening to the world around you. Watch a thunderstorm. Be aware of others around you, open your eyes. 

Everyone has their own story, their own journey, be mindful of that. You may feel alone but you are surrounded by many who are also going through their own journeys too.
 
*Never use it as an excuse
 
If your mental well being has affected others, be aware of that and make it right. Your behaviour could have a knock on effect to others, and as I've said above, you can't understand anyone else's journey fully, but you are responsible for your own. Mental Health is never an excuse to be cruel or mean to someone. You of all people know the power of an encouraging word or a hug, a smile and know how an angry face when you are feeling down can be the thing that causes you to break, and feel worse. BE 'MINDFUL' OF THAT.
 
Through an acceptance of myself I am hoping that I have found myself a happier place. I have connected online with other adults with ADHD to see how they have managed their own journeys. Being self-aware has given me the tools to take little steps in finding a better life balance for myself.
 
If I volunteer to do something, I do it not for the praise of others or the need of their adoration, friendship or the desire of feeling wanted. I do it because I want to and because I want to feel my own self-worth. I'm also very aware that being busy all the time isn't THE answer.

I am sure life will still find a way to present me new challenges, new adventures. But for now, I'm happy to know, that I quite like me, especially now I know who I am.

​Life is a journey and most journeys include ups and downs, right paths, wrong paths, moments of feeling lost or moments of absolute joy. Not all of us walk the same path, some of us are lucky enough to have our paths cross each other, to share a moment in that journey together. 

Above all, this is YOUR journey and YOU are responsible for the direction you take it, so if you can, try and make sure to enjoy the little things and appreciate where you have been and all you have achieved. 

Louise Gooding
Find me on Twitter @OnceUponALouise

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Thanks chick, great stuff! I can certainly relate to "busy = happy" ... An attitude I learned to fight against a few years back. A good reminder.

Find out more about Mental Health Awareness Week here, and be well!

Lou x
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Find me on Facebook
...and on Twitter
Born to be a Tourist

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How to be Smart in a World of Dumb Social Media 'Pros'

8/6/2015

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I am excited to welcome Louisa Whitney to my blog today - especially given her subject of choice. I am a huge fan of social media and the benefits it can bring when used correctly, and Louisa is here to agree!

Enjoy the post and remember, if you'd like to guest blog here (you could get several thousands views of a post!), get in touch!

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What can social media teach us about writing?


I'm really excited to be doing this guest blog so I can share my thoughts on what social media can teach us about writing.  There are many writing snobs out there who cringe at the thought of the 140 character update on twitter.  And yes some are in indecipherable text speak.  But actually I have learned an awful lot about superfluous words from twitter.  You know, you write a tweet and it's a tad too long and then you have to edit.  In my experience there is nearly always a word you can take out and still be saying the same thing.  Social media is also a great place to get content for your feed, or ideas for a blog post.  You can also start conversations with people you don't know how to talk to in "real life".

The editing down of tweets has been such a useful exercise for me.  In my previous career as a solicitor, I'll be honest, I tended towards being a bit wordy.  I'm not sure why lawyers feel the need to use 15 words when 5 would do.  You throw in an "indeed" here and an "obviously" there.  I suspect it dates back to being paid by the word.  Or it's hiding a lack of self-confidence (which may surprise you!).  But when I started up as a freelance blogger I really had to wrestle with the desire to put in more words, not take some out.

PictureFrom: TheAntisocialMedia.com
But blogs should be pithy and have a point. If your blog is 1,200 words long, how many readers will finish it? So learning to say what you need to in a punchy way is a really important skill in advertising yourself online, and trying to encourage people to read what you're about. Set yourself a challenge: write something that you want to tell people about, and then revisit it and see how many words you can remove whilst still saying the same thing. You may find you surprise yourself (or you may surprise yourself - see 2 words out already)!

Don't get me wrong, I am not in any way trying to argue that you only ever want to read short blogs. I have read some great articles online that have taken up a number of screens. And let's never forget that beautiful world of books packed with perfect lines of prose. Each has their place in the world. But in terms of getting your message across on the internet, your message needs to be short, snappy and eye grabbing and if you waffle on you will lose people's attention. Readers online have a much shorter attention span than people in a library or a book shop. People want to find what they're looking for, connect with it and move forward. That's the instant world we live in now.

So the next time you have to painstakingly edit a tweet, look at what words you're cutting out. Can you say the same thing and still lose a word? Or re-frame the sentence and see if you can use less words? No, it's not going to be a novel but you may just find that your tweet or your blog gets more attention and isn't that the point of it?


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Wonderful Louisa, encouraging post. Best of luck with your writing, and thanks for guest blogging for me today.

Want to hear more from Louisa?

Find Louisa on Twitter: @LouisaWhitney She's a keen tweeter on meditation and mindfulness, so go visit!
Don't forget to look at Louisa's blog too: www.louisawhitney.com

Louise x

Find me on Facebook
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Born to be a Tourist

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Climbing the Literacy Beanstalk

11/4/2014

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This week on MISS WRITE I'm featuring the charity "Beanstalk".

Beanstalk is a British organisation who says their visions is "a nation of confident children who can read and grow up to lead successful lives."

I grew up with having a bedtime story every night - and if I'm honest, I'd still take one before bed if I could! Every child should have this opportunity, for family bonding as well as education and teaching them how fun books can be. I hope you enjoy hearing about their valuable work, and that it inspires you to give a little more (books, time, your skills - anything!) this week. 

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What’s your earliest memory of reading? Did you read by torchlight after your parents strictly put you to bed? Which author makes you think of your childhood? These are the memories every child deserves.

About Beanstalk

Beanstalk is a national charity that recruits and trains local people to volunteer to go into a local primary school to support children who are struggling with their reading. Beanstalk has been
working with schools for almost 40 years to help raise literacy standards. 

Why are we needed?

 • Almost one in eight children leaves primary school behind in their reading in England.

• Research has shown that literacy leads to low employment prospects, disengagement and is
closely linked with poverty, educational under-achievement, crime and long term unemployment.

Beanstalk helps by providing sustained one-to-one literacy support to children who are falling behind the expected reading level for their age. By sharing dedicated reading time with a trusted adult on a weekly basis, a child can build their confidence around literacy.

In Northamptonshire we are currently supporting over 100 primary schools and nearly 400 children across the county but we currently have more schools and children waiting for reading helpers than we do have volunteers.

What's the impact of the service?

Children are selected for a variety of reasons:

 • They may have low confidence in reading

 • They may have English as a second or third language

 • Their reading may be below the expected national curriculum level

 • They may have insufficient reading opportunities (e.g. no books at home, no one to help encourage them to pick up a book).

• They may be a "Looked After Child" who needs a bit of extra guidance.

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 Who are our "reading helpers"?

Our reading helpers come from all walks of life. They are independent, committed individuals with a genuine interest in helping children achieve. Reading helpers spend 30 minutes with each child twice a week, chatting, reading and playing games. They will have the chance to build up a great rapport with the children and tailor the sessions to their individual needs.

We provide training to our reading helpers before they start and further development training in areas such as dyslexia awareness and phonics. We ensure they have resources for their sessions which are suited to the children they’re helping by providing them with Beanstalk book boxes. 

 ‘ The children give me immense joy and pride in seeing children develop during the course of the school year is amazing. I enjoy their smiles, the fun, the stories and their humour’.

                        ~ one of Beanstalk's existing reading helpers

How can you help? 

At Beanstalk we look for people with a passion for reading who can give their time to help inspire the next generation of readers.

If you can spare a couple of mornings or afternoons a week during school term time this could be the ideal opportunity for you.

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Beanstalk needs reading helpers - badly. However, not everyone has this time to give. Please do check out Beanstalk on Twitter and Facebook  though, and see where it takes you. If you don't feel you can give any of your time, get in touch with Beanstalk anyway - there may be other ways you can help (e.g. donating money or books, or helping to spread the word about their excellent and worthwhile work).

Thanks Greg - it's wonderful to hear about such great charity work involving books and literacy here in Northamptonshire. I am all for this! Also, as a bonus, I think my readers will be pleased I'm back to writing and book themed topics after a couple of weeks of environmental issues and... bacon! 

See you next week!

Lou x

Find me on Facebook
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Born To be A Tourist

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Nailing NaNoWriMo

6/12/2013

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Good afternoon everyone again, thanks for stopping by my weekly writing blog! This week I welcome Sarah LaFleur, NaNoWriMo winner for 2013. She's here to share how she (and 311,830 other dedicated writers) conquered the international NaNo challenge and managed to write a novel in one month. I've invited Sarah to tell us what she learned about her skills as a writer, and to see if she'd brave NaNo again! Take it away, Sarah, and thanks again for guest blogging. 

How I Nailed NaNoWriMo

Like many other writers, I accepted the NaNoWriMo (National Novel Writing Month) challenge to write a novel (or at least 50K words of one) during the month of November.  This being my first time participating, I wasn’t sure what to expect.  After 30 days of nearly continuous writing (I took 2 days off to work on another project with a pressing deadline) I finished with 50,182 words and a decent first draft of a new science fiction novel!






























Now as most writers know, writing daily can be easy or excruciating depending on the circumstances going into the session.  One of the most difficult parts of this challenge was the feeling that I couldn’t miss a day, even if I wasn’t particularly inspired to write anything.  My initial goal was to get ahead early.  That plan failed miserably!  If you look at my NaNo graph, every time I pulled ahead, something would come up (remember those break days?) to thwart my advance.

Yet, somehow I managed to “win” by getting all my words.  

How did I accomplish this feat?  

Well, I had a great support system of writing buddies to cheer me on and keep me going.  Often we would meet on twitter and complete “writing sprints” together by writing for a set amount of time and then tweet our word count for the duration.  I also had my own motivation in the form of a sticker chart (yes stickers!) where I would earn a small sticker for every 250 words and a big sticker when I hit my daily goal of 1750 words.  There were so many days I would have quit if it weren’t for that big sticker reward.

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PictureSarah LaFleur


So, what did I learn from this experience?  

Firstly, I am a very consistent writer.  Whatever word count I achieve in the first thirty minutes of writing typically stays the same for the duration of the session.  I have always been a fly-by-the-seat-of-my-pants author, but I outlined extensively (meaning I spent an entire hour placing chapter markers and notes for all 30 days) and that helped get me through the dead zones of the book.  I am incapable of writing without editing at the same time, and although it cost me on my daily count, I’m hoping it will also mean when I revisit the story in a few months, I’ll still like it.  

Finally, all this begs the question; will I participate again next year?  

Well, in the interest of preserving my marriage, my official answer right now is "maybe".  However, I predict that by the time next November first rolls around, my fingers will once again be poised over the keyboard ready to type with reckless abandon for another 30 days…

Sarah LaFleur

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Thanks Sarah, that was a really interesting account of your NaNo experience - love the sticker chart idea! Getting ahead of yourself and something coming up to 'thwart' your advances sounds so familiar, even to me, an as yet non-NaNo writer. 

Check out more from Sarah Lafleur on her website, find her on Facebook, and on Twitter - how we connected initially! She's also got an author page on Amazon, so take a look!

More from me next week - keep writing!

Lou x

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Born to be a Tourist - my travel blog

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The Question Every Author Dreads!

27/9/2013

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Hi again, thanks for joining me on my writing blog! This week we have a special treat: a guest blog from Scottish writer Jayne Baldwin. Jayne is a published novelist and she's agreed to share with us her feelings about the question all writers dread the minute they're published...

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After a recent reading at a local library, I was asked what I was working on next. As the book I was reading from had not been officially launched, I had to take a deep breath and count to ten before pointing out that I still had this one to promote. I remember being asked the same question, quite frequently, after my first book was published four years ago. Of course it's wonderful that people are interested in what you're doing but, I think, only other writers really understand just what goes into researching, writing and promoting a book, whether it's fiction or, like my new book, non fiction. 

There are various points during the creation of a book when it's tempting to sit back and sigh in a satisfied way; after the first draft when you've managed to get all the research in place and perhaps again when the finished manuscript has gone off to the publisher or layout designer. In both cases you have to pinch yourself (perhaps punch would be better) because after the first draft there are endless edits to do, and if it's non fiction, illustrations to find, copyright to track down and permissions to sort out. Even when the book's finished there's no opportunity to sit back and admire it because then the promotion starts. This is the situation whether you're being published or, as is increasingly the case, self publishing. My first two books were published by a local company and I was absolutely thrilled when they said “yes” to my submission. But I soon discovered that the marketing department was virtually non-existent so as a journalist I found myself doing most of the work. My understanding, from writer friends, is that this is now increasingly the case even with large publishing houses, their budgets tightened and staff stretched.

PictureJayne Baldwin
A friend, who had been through a similar experience with a small publishing house, took the decision to set up her own company in order to produce the books she was writing. My new book, “Mary Timney: The Road to the Gallows”, has just been published under the imprint, Clayhole Publishing, which means that I had control over its production, will get the benefit from any sales and now need to get out there and promote it. 

Of course, this is the point where some writers panic. It's hard putting yourself ‘out there’ even if you know where ‘out there’ is. Readings, events and signings are an essential part of promotion if you want a book to sell on any scale, and for many people that's a difficult thing to do. Writing is a wonderful thing and many want to write simply for the pleasure of it, but if you want someone else to buy what you've written, you have to be prepared to sell it too. And you’ll still need to put up with questions like “what are you working on next?”, when you've only just finished a book that may have taken years to produce!

Jayne Baldwin

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Biography

Writer and journalist Jayne Baldwin lives in Galloway, south-west Scotland. Her new book, 'Mary Timney, The Road to the Gallows' published by Clayhole Publishing,  examines the tragic story behind The Glenkens Murder and the last public hanging of a woman in Scotland. She's also penned 'West Over the Waves, The Final Flight of Elsie Mackay' and 'The Belties of Curleywee Farm' both published by GC Books Ltd. 

Jayne is the Chair of Booktown Writers based in Wigtown, Scotland. She is also a director of the new children's publishing company Curly Tale Books Ltd. 

Find Jayne on Twitter and on Facebook. She's also got a great blog which you should definitely take a look at!  I particularly enjoyed Jayne's post on 'Writing (and reading) as therapy'.

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Thanks so much for blogging for me this week, Jayne - that's certainly a question I have been asked very often! Take a look at the Work in Progress (WIP) tab on the top of my website pages to see what I am working on just now...

See you next week!

Lou x

Find me on Facebook
...And on Twitter
Born to be a Tourist - my travel blog 

What's Next image courtesy of Green Book Blog

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Swanwick: A Review

23/8/2013

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Swanwick Summer Writing School has been running over 60 years. Based in Derbyshire for just one week in August, 200 published and unpublished writers meet together every year to learn, network, and grow in their craft. With a programme of eye-catching workshops and 'A class' speakers, who can blame them?!

Rae Argent, a writer friend of mine, went this year. She's an avid 'Swanwicker' and shares her experiences of this year's event on my blog this week. Take it away, Rae!


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What's to say. Swanwick was fantastic.

One of my favourite parts was our guest speaker James Moran (script writer for Dr Who, Primeval, Torchwood, Tower Block etc.) who ran a workshop.  That was a brilliant insight into what goes on behind the scenes and how to break into scriptwriting.

One of the courses I participated in was 'Literary Novels' - quite different from what I had expected but well worth going to.  It encouraged us to use imagery, not to curb our imaginations, and to introduce very well rounded characters.

'Fiction from Fact', a workshop by Syd Moore, was brilliant too. She encouraged us to write a short piece from a short sentence and let our imaginations do the work.  We were also tasked with writing a list of everyday questions we might ask our characters - that was fun! 

Our last evening speaker was Deborah Moggach, writer of "Best Exotic Marigold Hotel", among others.  She told us how it felt to watch her novel being turned into a film and where some of her ideas came from. 

Also, there was a workshop on short story competitions from Linda Lewis full of useful hints and how to make our stories stand out from the rest.

There were umpteen other courses/workshops. It was just FAB.

Rae Argent

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Thanks Rae - I bet you'll be heading off to Swanwick again as soon as you can! Keep an eye on the Swanwick website to see when 2014 tickets are available. 

Why not follow Rae on Twitter?

Keep writing!

Lou x

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Born To Be A Tourist

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Writing Inspired by Japanese Souvenirs

9/5/2013

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This week I welcome guest blogger Janet E. Cameron. She's a Dublin based Canadian author who can happily put her name against her novel 'Cinnamon Toast And The End Of The World'. In this short piece Janet shares how she was inspired by a Japanese souvenir and how writing a book can be compared to having a baby. 

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Daruma’s Other Eye

By Janet E. Cameron

If you go to any Buddhist temple in Japan at New Year’s, you’ll find Daruma dolls for sale. These are round figurines, usually made of papier-maché, depicting a grumpy-looking bearded man cloaked in red and gold with no arms or legs. The reference is to a monk called Bodhidharma who, according to legend, sat facing a wall in meditation for nine years. ‘And then his legs fell off!’ is the gleeful note the story ends on.

The first thing you notice about these dolls is that the eyes are blank, just staring white circles. This is because Darumas are meant to be used in setting goals for the new year. You colour in one of the eyes when you make your promise to yourself. Then, when you’ve achieved it, you colour in the other eye. So rather than scrawling down your resolutions on a scrap of paper and forgetting them, you’ll have a half-blind Daruma reproaching you from your shelf until you get your act together. On the flip side, looking at a Daruma with both his eyes coloured in gives a lifting sense of achievement.

Or so I imagine.

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That's Japan, in case you're wondering!
I lived in Japan for four years, and for three of them my apartment overlooked Sensoji, one of the most famous Buddhist temples in the country. At the end of December 2004 the area around my place was packed with stalls selling decorations and good luck charms for the new year: pine boughs, oranges, straw wreaths, lobster figurines painted with gold, an awful lot of chicken effigies (2005 was the year of the Rooster). On New Year’s Eve, I hit the streets with my Irish boyfriend to take in the atmosphere. People lined up to pray at the shrine in their winter kimonos, bought charms and hot saké from the vendors, chatted with friends. I accepted a very nice proposal of marriage. Three months later my boyfriend and I got married at Ueno City Hall, and then we were on a plane heading for Ireland. Two Daruma dolls from Sensoji were in our suitcases. 

I put the Darumas on the mantelpiece of our first apartment in Dublin and we each coloured in one eye. My husband wished for a decent job in the city. A few months later he was able to fill in his Daruma’s blank eye. I wished for the same thing. And then I got it. But…

I couldn’t bring myself to colour in that white circle. This particular goal didn’t seem big enough. I didn’t deserve to have a fully sighted Daruma on the shelf, not yet. I needed something more. 

Years passed. I got accepted to a master’s programme, went back to school, graduated. I finished the novel I’d started in 2010, Cinnamon Toast and the End of the World. I got an agent. Cinnamon Toast was accepted for publication. I dusted the half-blind Daruma every few weeks. 

I promised myself that I’d fill in the little guy’s other eye when Cinnamon Toast was printed and in my hands. That day came and went. When I saw it in a store, then. That would be the right time. It’s in stores all over Dublin. Now I’m telling myself that I don’t deserve a fully sighted Daruma until I’m sure the book will actually sell. 

Jesus H. Christ! That poor disgruntled red monk’s been missing an eye for EIGHT YEARS! What is it going to take for me to admit that I’ve accomplished something?

The truth is, I am one of those incredibly annoying people who find it difficult to acknowledge good fortune, although complaining is effortless and can go on forever. You hear so much about failures and flops: books, movies, marketing campaigns, perfectly nice space-alien cults that just didn’t work out. Why tempt fate by colouring in that eye? 

Except that fate doesn’t particularly care about what I do with my Japanese souvenirs. Why would I assume that it does? I blame those positive thinking gurus. Keep repeating ‘I’m wealthy’ and the money will appear. We’ve all heard it. I’ve even been told, straight-faced, that this is a great way to find a parking space. And while I’ve always suspected that the idea is a bit daft, I suppose part of me believes in it. Fate, Santa Claus, the Universe…they can hear your thoughts and they know if you’re plotting something naughty or nice. And if the universe really is standing outside my door poised to reward me for whatever I’m mentally affirming, why wouldn’t it be just as ready to give me a boot up the arse for my smugness and pride?

But there’s another, simpler, reason why I’m hesitating to give poor Daruma-san both his eyes. I lived in Cinnamon Toast land for several years. I rewrote and edited until I could practically stand up and recite the entire thing from memory. I know these characters better than I know my friends and family. It’s possible that I don’t want to say goodbye, and admitting that this task is finished would be doing just that. 

What am I doing instead? A lot of lurking. A lot of skulking. Checking the book’s stats obsessively online. Creeping into bookstores on my lunchbreak to spy on its progress. Worrying. Nail-biting. Rocking back and forth and hissing ‘my precious’ a lot. But this is normal, right? No, probably not. And it’s certainly not helping. 

I’ve heard people compare writing a book to giving birth to a baby. Yes, maybe. It is messy and painful and debilitating, and just about impossible to accomplish on your own. So sending your book to the marketplace must be like waving it goodbye on its first day of school. You can pack your kid’s lunch in the morning, walk her to the bus stop, help with homework, attend all the parent-teacher meetings. But you can’t follow her into the classroom and control what happens there. It’s out of your hands.

And, though I’m willing to do anything short of eating bugs on Youtube to sell this book, to a large extent it’s out of my hands as well. The story belongs to anyone who decides to read it now, and they can like it, hate it, or remain indifferent as they please. 

So, on this St Patrick’s Day, I’ll say, ‘Thank you, Ireland for giving me a place to write and a publisher for my story.’ And I’ll take my trusty marker and fill in that missing Daruma eye. In fact, I’m going to do it right now. 

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Janet Cameron
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Thanks Janet - I loved the line 'The story belongs to anyone who decides to read it now'. All the best with your writing. 

Check out Jan's website at A Simple Jan or find her on Twitter. See you next week y'all, when I'll be showing you how even I can have a successful author photo shoot - and so can you!

Lou x

Find me on Facebook
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Born to be a Tourist - my travel blog - have you checked it out yet?

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Happy World Poetry Day!

21/3/2013

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Today, 21st March is World Poetry Day. Every year on this date (since 1999) UNESCO celebrates poems and poets and I've joined forces with a writer local to me to bring you new material to celebrate in poetic style. GK Kingsley, a Northamptonshire poet, has entered the spirit of World Poetry Day by penning a something especially to celebrate today.

According to GK Kingsley, her quest is "to sow seeds that make people think about their lives, with bite size bits of poetry that are accessible to all. Some are humorous, some are thought provoking. But either way, it’s never a long haul trawl through my stuff.”

This poet has a following from around the world, from Australia to Hawaii to Alaska. She publishes a new poem three times a week on her website. I really like 'Double Trouble' and 'Make Life A Breeze', two show pieces beautifully displayed - not just lines of text!

Entitled ‘Love’, this specially written poem seeks to understand that most universal of ideas that touches all of our lives.  Enjoy. 

Love...

Is love all thrills and spills and fun

And feeling you're the only one?

Or does more loom when that is done?

To twist and bind the prize you've won

 

A patient sigh, reply, a smile

A kindess that is versatile

A loyalty to face the trial

Of life and all that can defile

 

The plying strings to fend off foes

A bobbin there to share your woes

And you, a fleece for their repose

To counter sadness, juxtapose

 

No, love's not thrills and spills and fun

But more a lifelong yarn that's spun

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Thanks GK - great to collaborate with you, and I wish you a happy World Poetry Day!

See more from GK Kingsley:

Website:  www.gkkingsley.com                       Pinterest: gkkingsley

Email: gk@gkkingsley.com                              Twitter: @gkkingsley

Facebook: gk.kingsley

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Tomorrow I'll be posting my regular weekly writing blog - this one was a bonus to celebrate World Poetry Day, you lucky things!

Lou x

Find me on Facebook
...And on Twitter
Born To Be A Tourist

Images from GK Kingsley's website and Off Timetable

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Kill Me Now - Lawrence Fisher

7/2/2013

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This week I am inviting Lawrence Fisher to talk to us. We "met" on one social media outlet or another and I thought I'd grab him and his wise words for my blog. He's a dating-themed novelist and there's a convenient crossover between the two of us, as you could imagine! I hope the following is useful to you, fellow writers.

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Hi Lawrence, thanks for joining me this afternoon. 

Can you describe your book for us - what genre would you classify it into?

My book "Kill Me Now" is all about my exploits, escapades and narrow escapes I had while doing what others have done before me; meaning to find that one lady who I will allow to make my life a living hell. Despite the fact that some of the dates were true terror, I would definitely classify this as humour.

How did you come up with the idea for the book?

It was a nice spring evening when I met, Ms Motor Mouth. Young Lawrence (ok, young at heart...) shaved, showered and perfumed himself up to meet Ms Motor Mouth, who was a blind date, bestowed upon him by a match maker. Yes, yes, you heard it, a match maker. Read my book for sordid details of the awfulness of this period. 

So I met Motor for coffee and for the better part of two hours, she did not stop talking. The poor waiter was standing next to her waiting for her to order while she went on and on. The only thing I knew about her soliloquy was that she was complaining about her job. Not explaining, but complaining. Should I have charged her $200 for therapy? 

My mind wondered and wandered and I looked up to the heavens for release. Scotty was not available, but the title was born. Thanks Ms Motor Mouth.

When and why did you begin writing?

When I was three! I picked up a pencil and started writing. I was so far advanced in my language skills that to this day no one has broke the hidden code behind my prose. I am sure that is how the Da Vinci code started out. Maybe in a hundred years some genius named Suineg will say “Hey, there is a pattern in this. Let us decipher this.” 

Perhaps I should have been a secret agent. Maybe I replace Daniel Craig as the next James Bond? Maybe I am just dreaming.

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Who is you favourite character in the book? 

I would have to say that my favourite character is obviously the person I know best. I know this guy very very well. Well at least I think I do. Yes, I am sure I do. I have never met him before, but I do see him every day when I shave. It is yours truly!

The second best character would have to be my best friend, Ed. I have known him for three decades. He keeps telling me that I am nuts. Why go out on dates and come and tell him about them. He is married and has this doomed look in his eyes. He told me once that if I ever get married he would first kill himself and then kill me. I am not sure how he intends to do that because if he kills himself, he will be dead and therefore not be able to kill me. But what do I know?

What was the hardest part of writing the book?

The research was both the hardest and the most fun. By research I meant going on dates. But it makes it sound as if I went on dates only for research. That is not true. The date only made it into the book if it turned out that she was worthy of a mention, such as one woman who threatened to kill me.

I can sympathise with you there! I met some truly contemptible and amazingly ridiculous people on my dates! 

So did you design the covers of the book yourself? 

I had a graphic designer do it. We discussed it together. The book is supposed to show that I as a male know nothing about women. I do not understand them and I am not afraid to say so. There are signals and hints that are sent out that women think are understood but they are not. If I understood those signals I would either be a woman myself or effeminate. So the poor guy on the cover, offering flowers, has no idea why his woman's so angry.

Did you learn anything from writing your book and what was it?

I learned a lot. Writing is a lot of fun. I also learned that what you say can and will be used against you.

What are your current projects?  We all want to know when your next book coming out!

I am currently working on book two and three of the “Kill Me Now!” trilogy. I am not sure when the sequel will be out as I am still looking for stories. Any reader want to send me a story that I can adopt as my own? The book will be called “How I didn’t meet your mother”.

Where and when do you prefer to do your writing? 

"Prefer" has nothing to do with it as it has to be when I come up with an idea. Believe it or not that normally happens when I am on the toilet. That is why my trusty iPhone is with me.

I love that play on words - 'How I Met Your Mother' is one of my favourite TV shows! 

Do you have anything specific that you want to say to readers?

Yes. Take the line from the Jackie Chan remake of Karate Kid “When life knocks you down, you can chose whether to get up or not.”

Quick-fire questions:

ebooks, paperbacks or hardcover? Paperbacks

Cats or dogs? Dogs, either golden cocker spaniels or golden retrievers

Coffee or tea? Coffee!!!!

Favourite food? Cheese cake!

Vanilla or chocolate ice-cream?  Chocolate!!!!!

What are 4 things you never leave home without? My keys, my iPhone, my shoes and my wits.

If you were deserted on an island, who are 3 famous people you would want with you any why? Anne Hathaway because she has the best smile and…, and Superman so that he can fly Anne and I away. But why would anyone desert me on an Island?

Which is your all-time favourite song (only one song please)? 

My Way - Frank Sinatra!

Thanks for joining us on the blog this week - all the best for your book and future challenges on the page and over dinner 'n' drinks!

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You can find out more about Lawrence and his writing here:

Twitter: https://twitter.com/lbigfoot

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/KMNow

Blog: http://killmenow.org/blog 


Take a look - he won't bite! Until next time...

Lou x

Find me on Facebook...
...And on Twitter
Born To Be A Tourist

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Introducing... Steve Clarkson!

20/12/2012

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I’d like to introduce Steve Clarkson to you this week. He’s a blogger and journalist I met via Twitter and he’s kindly agreed to be interviewed for my blog this week.

You’ve been a journalist for several organisations now. What is your first memory of writing, and of being interested in reporting the news?

To be honest, I wasn’t as interested in news reporting as you might think. Journalism appeals to me because it involves writing, which is (warning, cliché coming) something I always felt I was born to do. I’ve wanted to be a writer for as long as I remember. One of my first pieces was a review of my school’s production of Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat, which went in the school newsletter. I think I was 13.

Like me, you wrote for your student paper. What kind of articles did you write? Are you still connected with the paper or University?

I started off on music reviews, and covered a few university events — then, to my amazement, I was given my own column. I had the freedom to write about virtually anything that took my fancy, so long as it was of interest to students. CouchSurfing, freeganism, “smart drugs”, this cool police box where I worked… it was great fun. But all good things must come to an end, and I’m not connected to the university at all any more. I’d like to think I’ll live in Glasgow again sometime, because it’s a great city.

After your Masters in history, how did you wind up working in arts and entertainment reporting?

After graduating, I was so unprepared for work. I’d written a few articles for Metro while a student, so I naively assumed they’d at least strongly consider taking me on as a full-time member of staff as soon as I became available. They didn’t, so I went travelling in North America for three months. When I came back, I had a very stressful winter looking for a route into journalism (that’s when I wrote He Was Raised to Believe These Things Were Possible), but I eventually got a break in Manchester at a company called Adfero, where my job was to write 25 tailored news stories per day for various business websites. I learned a lot, but the writing wasn’t really up my street. From there, I went to Press Association, and thank goodness! I now write arts and entertainment features for PA’s clients, which include TV listings magazines and national newspapers, and with that on my CV I was also able to get some work with The Arts Desk, reviewing plays and festivals.

Sounds like a great start! How would you advise any budding journalists who were after a tip on getting started?


Just write, write, write. Definitely set up a blog. The more people you can get to read your material, the better, and having it online brings its own advantages. For example, if an editor wants to see samples of your work, it’s much easier to link him/her to a blog post than it is to email a Word document, or send a hard copy in the post. It’s really easy to set up a blog, and you can use it to build a portfolio. I would also say that developing a social presence is a good idea. Get a Twitter account, and use it to connect with professionals and generate exposure to your articles. Don’t be shy about it.

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One thing to remember is that there’s no regular path into journalism. No formula for success. Sure, some people study Journalism or Media Studies at university (Sheffield, City College London and Sunderland are institutions to consider for this), but bear in mind there are more media students than media jobs. I know a girl who writes for Huffington Post — she has a degree in English Literature. Then there’s this other guy who never even went to university — and just focused on acquiring experience over the years — and he now writes for The Independent. Take a look at online forums and see how others are developing their journalism skills and experience. Wannabe Hacks is an excellent resource that provides a much better understanding of where to go next.

Journalism is a very competitive industry. You’ll need to persevere and draw on everything you have to stand out from the thousands and thousands of people you’re competing with on every step of the ladder. It’s worth it, though. In the end, you either succeed or give up.

The media have been, err… in the news quite a bit lately. How do you think this has affected trust in the printed daily word?

It’s been in the news because it concerns the news makers. I think that the Leveson Inquiry, however important the issues it has raised are, is something the media obsesses about more than the people who actually read the papers. I think ordinary people were pretty shocked when the Milly Dowler story first broke, and when News of the World got shut down, but now the dust has settled I really don’t think trust in the tabloids has been affected all that much. Most people already knew not to believe everything the papers say.

So true - there's even a Joseph and the Amazing Technicolour Dreamcoat reference there! Potiphar: "Don't believe everything you read, dear!"

Where do you find your inspiration for your prose?

Ordinary people, mundane routines, the drudgery of work, small talk, hope, tragedy, comedy, prejudice, envy, innocence, cups of tea, whisky, insomnia, awkward moments, heartache, euphoria...

You review a lot of albums on your blog. What is your all-time favourite album?

That’s a tough one. How about I tell you my favourite album to write to, which is Everybody Digs Bill Evans. It just makes me pretend I’m a writer living in a dingey flat in 1950s New York, rather than a writer a dingey flat in 2010's East Yorkshire.

If you were off sick one day, what crappy daytime TV would you watch now you’ve gone off Jeremy Kyle?

Did I actually say I’d gone off Jeremy Kyle in that piece? (I have.) I got the feeling - Lou.  I watch property shows if I get time during the day, so probably something like Homes under the Hammer or Escape to the Country — even if they remind me that I’ll not have a mortgage for a long, long time…

Did meeting Westlife bring out the inner boy band fan inside you?! I was kinda jealous… 

I certainly got off the phone (yes, it was just a phone interview) more of a fan than I was before. They were nice lads, and surprisingly honest. It took ages to transcribe it from my dictaphone, though, because of their accents and how quickly they spoke!

In your recent blog post ‘The Next Big Thing Blog Hop’  you mention you’re writing a collection of short stories and poems. Is there a theme in mind or is it a general Steve Clarkson collection?

I’m trying not to think about things on that scale at the moment. I just take each story as it comes. They each tend to start with a line or an image appearing in my head. Looking back at what I've written so far, I think the throughline is one of a generation lost, anxious, and confused. Cheery stuff.

What do you think are the best ways which indie writers like ourselves can gain more exposure for our work?

This is something I don’t have much authority on. Although I've been writing creatively for some time, I feel quite new to this game. At the moment I’m just Tweeting links to short stories on my blog and hoping for a few hits, but I do think that authors who’ve gone it alone benefit hugely from interacting with each other. It’s clearly a changing industry, and pooling our knowledge of marketing techniques, writing competitions, literary agents on the prowl etc. etc. will be instrumental in any publishing success we can ever hope to enjoy.

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What was the last book you enjoyed reading?

I’ve been reading David Foster Wallace’s "Infinite Jest" for months and months now (the clue’s in the title), but before that... It was actually something not too literary and probably more of a toilet book — I, Partridge: We Need to Talk About Alan. It was hilarious.

Quick fire: Coffee or tea? Tea.

Ebooks – yes or no? No.

Ski or sunbathe? Sunbathe.


Thanks for speaking with me today, Steve, and merry Christmas to you!

Steve Clarkson works for the Press Association in East Yorkshire, UK. He writes features for the Metro newspaper, the Arts Desk, Sabotage Times, and “indulges in creative projects sporadically”.
Steve is available for hire for production of high-quality content, for web or print. Interested companies or Editors can email him at steve_clarkson_29@hotmail.com. Here’s his Twitter, Facebook, and LinkedIn. Steve’s blog “clarkspeak” is updated regularly, so take a look. 

Until next time...

Lou x

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    I'm a writer based in South Wales, with an unhealthy obsession with stationery and baking. I mainly blog for my own sanity, but I'm also working on a novel. Still. 

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